Get Money, Get Apologies, Get A TV Show, Get Old, Get Handsome

Get Money, Get Paid

So, I've been trying to get into a new crib for about eight months now.  I want to get into a new place so that I can craft the ultimate bachelor pad that will attract the honies like a homing beacon.  I've been getting my credit in order, putting money away, and selling my books so that I could start stacking that paper.  Once I do get that sweet sweet crib, I need to know how to put it together so that vagina panties will be hitting the floor.  That is why I am thankful for instructional videos like the one provided by MrChiCity3.  MrChiCity3, you da man, fo real.

Red Apologizes

I want to send my apologies to DerrickH and Loserly for calling into DPL700 then bailing, then calling in again only to bail again.  Unlike most occasions where I am taken away from the show, this was not due to my DSFUCKINGL being an impotent piece of shit.  Let me explain...

The first time I left was because a bounty hunter came pounding on my door.  He's looking for my sister's boyfriend which he thinks is me based on my sister and I sharing the same last name and looking nothing alike.  He came pounding on my door, I hung up to deal with his ass.  Again.  Hopefully, he'll get the message this time.

I had scheduled an appointment to meet with a life insurance agent to set up a policy.  This was the second person to come knocking on my door.  It's not that I had forgotten about the appointment, it's that I lost track of time.  I would have told the agent to come back another time, but the agent, Sharlene, was a woman who looked approximately like the person pictured above.  I thoroughly enjoyed talking to this woman.

A funny thing happened during the presentation the agent gave to me.  During a video she played about death expenses and how life insurance can pay for them, the announcer said something about grief.  He said, "Grief is hard."  I had to stifle my laughter when I heard that.

So, there's my reasons for my actions during DPL700.  These are not excuses, these are reasons.  Again, apologies to DerrickH and Loserly.  Hopefully the next time I call in my DSFUCKINGL will not fail and I will not fail.  Hopefully.

I Wholeheartedly Support This

I Am A Male Model

With the nomination of Mitt Romney and Paul Ryan to be the Republican nominee for President and Vice President this week, a lot of questions have come up about this duo's background.  One of the most frequently asked questions is where did those two get those chiseled good looks and obvious poise.  These attributes are not inborn, they have to be taught to you.  So, where did Mitt Romney and Paul Ryan gain the expertise that made them such an attractive tandem?  The answer is that they went to the Handsome Boy Modeling School.

Founded by Prince Paul and Dan the Automator in 1999, Handsome Boy Modeling School is the only school in North America dedicated to the crafting of exquisite young male models.  For only $60, payable by check, you can learn the skills necessary to become the kind of man that is actively sought by the leading Balkan region fashion designers.

Graduates of the Handsome Boy Modeling School include such dynamic specimens of masculinity as Del Tha Funkee Homosapien, Tim Meadows, Mike Shinoda, RZA, Jack Johnson, and Father Guido Sarducci. 

Handsome Boy Modeling School: Not affiliated with Chris Elliot or Gingers.