Reviewing Greenlight

Steam Greenlight- Face Of Mankind

 

This is Face Of Mankind, an MMO currently on Steam's Greenlight program.  There are some talented people who put this game together.  I know one of them, CJ Allford.  I want to help CJ, and the people he's working with, get this game on Steam.  So, please, just help by giving it a rating.  Thank you.

Face Of Mankind: Steam Greenlight Page

Red Review: The New Normal: Pilot

Recently KSL television, a NBC affiliate, released a statement saying that they were not going to air the upcoming new television series The New Normal.  Jeff Simpson, the CEO of Bonneville International, said that the show's "dialogue might be excessively rude and crude. The scenes may be too explicit or the characterizations might seem offensive... For our brand, this program feels inappropriate on several dimensions, especially during family viewing time."  This statement caused me to want to seek out The New Normal.  There are two reasons for this.

The first is the use of the word "might" in the statement released by Jeff Simpson.  This suggests to me that the people in charge at KSL did not watch an episode of The New Normal.  This suggests to me that the people in charge at KSL based their decision on just the basic synopsis of the show, which is:

"Bryan and David are a happy Los Angeles couple, with successful respective careers. The only thing missing in their relationship is a baby. They meet Goldie, a single Midwestern mother and waitress, who has moved to L.A. with her eight-year-old daughter Shania. Jane, Goldie's grandmother, follows her family to the city against her grandaughter's wishes. Goldie decides to become Bryan and David's surrogate, which includes her family."

Source: Wikipedia

KSL is the NBC affiliate that serves the Salt Lake City Area, which is where I live.  KSL is owned by Bonneville International.  Bonneville International is a subsidiary of The Church Of Jesus Christ Of Latter Day Saints.  To me, in my life and my social interactional experiences, the LDS Church represents The Man, and I refuse to submit to The Man.

These two reasons drove me to want to watch The New Normal, every episode, as soon as I could, even if it sucked.  This is the same approach I took to another TV series KSL chose not to air, The Playboy Club.  It was my hope that this experience with raging out against the man would not be so torturous.

Soon after KSL made their decision, I heard that the pilot episode of The New Normal was available on Hulu.  So, I watched The New Normal on Hulu.  Unlike many other shows I watch on Hulu, I chose to watch The New Normal while sober.

The pilot episodes of most shows are supposed to set up the characters in a TV series, the situation that they are in, and any possible conflicts that may immediately arise.  The pilot episode of The New Normal does that in a way that is inviting and somewhat entertaining.  Not much depth is given to the two male leads, played by Andrew Rannells and Justin Bartha, but I have faith that such depth will be added in the future.  A lot of time is given to the lead female of the series, played by Georgia King, and her daughter, played by Bebe Wood.  This establishes a mother/daughter bond between the two, a dynamic that I comes across as warm and genuinely sweet.  There is one quibble I have with the pilot episode.

Ellen Barkin plays Jane Forrest, the grandmother of Goldie, the female lead.  Jane Forrest's role in the series seems to be the antagonist.  In the pilot episode, Jane gets into an argument with nearly every major character, save eight year old Shania.  The character of Jane Forrest comes across as a shrill obnoxious bigot.  Jane Forrest is also seen with short blonde hair, a pantsuit, and a face that screams plastic surgery.

This is Jan Brewer, current governor of Arizona.  In liberal circles, she comes across as a shrill obnoxious bigot.  Look at what she how she appears in the picture provided above.

Now look at these two side by side.  Jane Forrest is essentially Jan Brewer.  If I am going to continue to see the character of Jane Forrest as intriguing, she needs to have some redeeming qualities.  If Jane Forrest is a photocopy of Jan Brewer, that may not be possible.

Overall, The New Normal appears to be an intriguing show for the new fall.  I'm looking forward to more episodes of this show when it premiers, not on KSL, on September 11th.

The New Normal: Pilot: Recommended

By the way, it seems odd to me that a show is premiering on September 11th.  Given the great national tragedy that happened on that day, I expected that day to be filled with remembrances, tributes, and faux patriotic messages from the conservative right.  Maybe that's just me.  Maybe that they cynic in me.  Maybe I don't exactly have an ending for this thought.  Hey look, a kitty.

Volume 11: Part 1- Moenia Prima: Friday, May 6th, 12:08 P.M.

Friday, May 6^th, 12:08 P.M.

            I ditched school again for another interview, but this time my efforts weren’t a complete waste.  I actually met with an interviewer at Warrior Technological today.  I checked in with the receptionist at 9:45, sat and waited, then got called into the interviewer’s office at 10:15.  That is when it all turned to shit.

            The interviewer opened the door to his office to me and told me to take a seat, which I did.  The interviewer picked up my resume off his desk and read it for some time.  Finally, he said to me, “Hay-to.”

            I responded, “Actually, it’s pronounced Ha-to.”

            “Ha-to?”

“Yes.”

The interviewer then mumbled dismissively and went back to reading my resume.  After some time, the interviewer said, “Hato.  Is that short for something?”

“Excuse me?”

I’d like to say what followed was unexpected.  I really would.  “You heard me, you opfer prick.  Is Hato short for anything?”  Did I mention the interviewer was verbrecher?  Although I was mentally preparing myself for a hard interview upon seeing him, the language the interviewer used toward me knocked me back a bit.  I expected a person in his position to at least not openly express his racism.

I took a moment to catch my breath and say, “No, Hato is my real name.”

“Is Hato one of those perverse nicknames you young fretons call each other?”  That shocked me, and I physically expressed my shock.  It had been years, YEARS, since someone had called me a freton.  At that moment, I knew the kind of vile, venomous hatred this interviewer was harboring against me.

I cleared the shock from my face and tried to press forward.  “Hato Shurtleff is my full legal name.  I can even show you my school ID if you want.”

“No.  I don’t need to see one of your half-assed freton forge jobs.”  I don’t understand this comment.  Not the freton part, the part where he accused me of forgery.

The interview didn’t get much better from that.  We went over my academic history, where he implied that I cheat everyday in school, my job history, where he implied that I was lazy and useless, and my qualifications, which he blatantly called bullshit.  By the time this whole process was finished, this interviewer had hurled a wider variety and higher amount of insults at me than I’ve ever encountered in my life.  This is the worst experience with a verbrecher I’ve ever had.

After I left the Warrior Technological offices, I felt was emotionally raw.  I still am.  I had meant to go back to school after my interview but I don’t feel like doing that now.  I feel like using my osher skills to scamper to the roof of a building, lying flat on my back and staring at the sky for a while.  I probably won’t do that.  I’d probably get caught by some security guard, and if the guard happens to be verbrecher, he’d shoot me and call it self-defense.  Oh well.

Later.

Hato Shurtleff

Volume 11: Part 1- Moenia Prima: Tuesday, May 3rd, 5:18 P.M.

Tuesday, May 3^rd, 5:18 P.M.

            Today was my interview for the position of office assistant at Barrett, Copeland, and Reno.  Based on the race question I encountered on the application, I was sure this was going to go badly.  Well guess what?  It went badly!  I’m as shocked as you are.

            I ditched school to go to my ten A.M. appointment at BC&R.  I would have asked for a later appointment but this allowed me to ditch school for a legitimate reason, which is a good thing.  My parents would disagree, but they tend to disagree with me on a lot of things.  I got to the BC&R offices at 9:45, checked in, and was told to sit in the waiting area untill my name was called.  So I waited.

And waited.

And waited.

Occasionally I checked in to make sure the receptionist hadn’t forgotten but mostly I waited.

And waited.

And waited.

And waited.

For several hours I waited for my interview at Barrett, Copeland, and Reno to call my name.  As I sat patiently in the waiting room, I saw several applicants enter, check in, get called to be interviewed, then leave with either a happy, sad, or indifferent look on their face.  And I continued to wait.

And wait.

And wait.

As I waited I noticed something.  All of the applicants that came in and were seen were verbrecher.  In fact, outside of a delivery guy that came in at about one, I was the only opfer that entered the waiting room at Barrett, Copeland, and Reno that day.  Weird.

At about 4:30 the office started clearing out.  No one told me that everyone was going home for the day untill the receptionist came over and asked me what I was doing.  This was the same receptionist I saw at 9:45, had checked in with about every hour or so, acting as if she had never seen me before.  I ditched school for this?

I’m walking home right now with a feeling of dejection in my mind and a completely empty feeling in my stomach.  This is bullshit.  Fucking bullshit.

Goodnight.

Hato Shurtleff

Get Money, Get Apologies, Get A TV Show, Get Old, Get Handsome

Get Money, Get Paid

So, I've been trying to get into a new crib for about eight months now.  I want to get into a new place so that I can craft the ultimate bachelor pad that will attract the honies like a homing beacon.  I've been getting my credit in order, putting money away, and selling my books so that I could start stacking that paper.  Once I do get that sweet sweet crib, I need to know how to put it together so that vagina panties will be hitting the floor.  That is why I am thankful for instructional videos like the one provided by MrChiCity3.  MrChiCity3, you da man, fo real.

Red Apologizes

I want to send my apologies to DerrickH and Loserly for calling into DPL700 then bailing, then calling in again only to bail again.  Unlike most occasions where I am taken away from the show, this was not due to my DSFUCKINGL being an impotent piece of shit.  Let me explain...

The first time I left was because a bounty hunter came pounding on my door.  He's looking for my sister's boyfriend which he thinks is me based on my sister and I sharing the same last name and looking nothing alike.  He came pounding on my door, I hung up to deal with his ass.  Again.  Hopefully, he'll get the message this time.

I had scheduled an appointment to meet with a life insurance agent to set up a policy.  This was the second person to come knocking on my door.  It's not that I had forgotten about the appointment, it's that I lost track of time.  I would have told the agent to come back another time, but the agent, Sharlene, was a woman who looked approximately like the person pictured above.  I thoroughly enjoyed talking to this woman.

A funny thing happened during the presentation the agent gave to me.  During a video she played about death expenses and how life insurance can pay for them, the announcer said something about grief.  He said, "Grief is hard."  I had to stifle my laughter when I heard that.

So, there's my reasons for my actions during DPL700.  These are not excuses, these are reasons.  Again, apologies to DerrickH and Loserly.  Hopefully the next time I call in my DSFUCKINGL will not fail and I will not fail.  Hopefully.

I Wholeheartedly Support This

I Am A Male Model

With the nomination of Mitt Romney and Paul Ryan to be the Republican nominee for President and Vice President this week, a lot of questions have come up about this duo's background.  One of the most frequently asked questions is where did those two get those chiseled good looks and obvious poise.  These attributes are not inborn, they have to be taught to you.  So, where did Mitt Romney and Paul Ryan gain the expertise that made them such an attractive tandem?  The answer is that they went to the Handsome Boy Modeling School.

Founded by Prince Paul and Dan the Automator in 1999, Handsome Boy Modeling School is the only school in North America dedicated to the crafting of exquisite young male models.  For only $60, payable by check, you can learn the skills necessary to become the kind of man that is actively sought by the leading Balkan region fashion designers.

Graduates of the Handsome Boy Modeling School include such dynamic specimens of masculinity as Del Tha Funkee Homosapien, Tim Meadows, Mike Shinoda, RZA, Jack Johnson, and Father Guido Sarducci. 

Handsome Boy Modeling School: Not affiliated with Chris Elliot or Gingers.