On Wednesday, the office of Utah Governor Gary Herbert made the decision to not recognize same sex marriages conducted between Judge Shelby's decision on December 20th and the stay on the decision issued by the Supreme Court on January 6th. This decision by the governor's office sent me into a rage, during which I did this.
Clearly me being mad like this isn't healthy, not just because massive explosions tend to destroy carbon-based physical objects, but also because staying in such a state causes my cholesterol to spike. Clearly I need something to make me happy. Perhaps something from a place of magic and whimsy can give me the happiness I crave. Perhaps I am in need of something from Japan.
No, I said happy, not even more skeptical about public officials and the statement that they give. I need something happy! HAPPYHAPPYHAPPYHAPPYHAPPYHAPPYHAPPYHAPPYHAPPYHAPPY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Like many Americans, the employees of The Redertainment Corporation Of America struggle to maintain a healthy weight. Our employees have tried many different solutions to this problem, all of them unsuccessful. In recent month, however, we at The Redertainment Corporation Of America have finally found a solution. This is a solution that is a godsend to many of our employees, particularly the fat ones. Now we wish to share this solution with you. The Redertainment Corporation Of America is proud to present The Redertainment Diet.
Many diets out there have restrictions on what you can and cannot eat. It is this part of dieting that most people have a problem with. With The Redertainment Diet you don't have to struggle with this. With The Redertainment Diet, all your dietary choices are made for you in a way that surprisingly simple. With The Redertainment Diet you eat nothing. That's right, NOTHING.
Now, you may be asking "How can I explain why I am eating nothing?" It's simple: Take up a political cause that is either impossible or has no chance of succeeding. It's that simple. When people ask you why you aren't eating, simply say "I am going on a hunger strike untill ______." After giving that answer to people, no one will ever ask you again why you aren't eating.
Now, you may be asking "Does this really work?" Yes, The Redertainment Diet does work. Just ask these satisfied people.
"I'm Trestin Meacham, and I've lost twenty-five pounds while hunger striking for the nullification of gay marriage in Utah."
"I'm Eric Small, and I've lost fifteen pounds while hunger striking for the nationwide legalization of marijuana."
"I'm Mari Monzo, and I've lost thirty pounds while hunger striking for the Washington Redskins to change their name."
"I'm Jamie Kane, and I've lost fifty pounds hunger striking for President Obama to come out as a secretly gay married Kenyan socialist."
Don't you want to experience stunning results like this in your life? The Redertainment Diet. Try it today!
When the Occupy movement started flaring up, I retweeted many tweets sent out by Occupy protesters as well as the people who supported them. At that time I received complaints from people about my twitter barrage. For that I was sorry.
On Friday, a federal court judge struck down Utah's Amendment Three, making gay marriage legal in the state of Utah. I found out about this news on Twitter, and immediately started barraging twitter with message spreading the news and spreading the support for gay marriage in Utah. If I offended anybody with my Twitter barrage, I want you to know I apologize for nothing.
Recently
the topic of gay marriage has been flared up again. This came after Vice President Biden gave his
own personal views on the subject, which then served as motivation for
President Obama to give his own personal views on the subject, which then
caused everyone to freak out. This topic
coming up again has served as an inspiration for many bloggers, opinionists,
pundits, politicians, and many other kids of non-influential people to give
their opinion on the subject. I am among
them.
In
listening and reading to the various arguments for or against gay marriage, I
did not hear one that fell in line with my views. These are views that I have not just about
gay marriage, but also about marriage in general. That argument is what follows.
As it
currently stands in America, marriage is a part of religion. Many will give a long historical account of
how it isn't, however that seeks to reeducate people about a concept that they
have been aware of for their entire lives.
As long as I, my parents, and my grandparents have been alive, marriage
has been a religious institution. The
tradition is that if you get married you get married in a place and in a way
that has a religious connection to it. If
you do not follow this tradition, you are generally looked down upon socially,
even if that is not openly expressed.
The fact is this: As we currently perceive marriage, marriage and
religion are one.
When the
controversy about the Obamacare Birth Control Mandate came up, the interaction
between religion and government was brought up.
Part of the argument against the mandate was made by Tim Dolan. Tim Dolan currently serves as the President
of the United States Conference of Catholic Bishops. On an appearance on CBS This Morning, Bishop
Dolan said the following:
DOLAN: ...[W]e just have to stick with principle here, and
we're just- what we're very reluctant to do- and what I think wise voices are
saying- is we can't have a government bureaucracy invading the privacy and the
independence and autonomy and the integrity that our Constitution gives to
religion.
While
many disagree with the viewpoint Bishop Dolan has on birth control, the point
that he makes about the interaction between government and religion is
sound. Why should the government be
invading the religious beliefs of any person?
Why should the government be allowed to interpret what another person's
religious beliefs are?
Imagine
that you are in a house. You can move
anywhere and in any way that you want, but you cannot move in a way that takes
you out of that house. The very fact
that there is a house, with walls a roof and presumably a front door, restricts
your freedom to move. You may never move
in a way that causes you to bump up against those restrictions, or want to move
in a way that causes you to bump up against those restrictions, but the very
fact that those restrictions are there restricts your freedom to move.
This can
be applied to marriage. The government
has rules about marriage. You can move
in any way you wish to move within those rules of marriage. Sure, those rules may be something that you
are comfortable with. Sure, those rules
may be something that you may never challenge.
Sure, those rules may fall within your religious beliefs, but those
rules exist. Those rules exist and act
upon an institution that is fundamental to your religion. Those rules pertaining to marriage restrict
your religious liberty. Even if you
never challenge those rules, those rules prevent you from expressing your
religion in the way that you feel is right.
Those rules mandate that you express your religion in a way that the
government interprets as correct.
Why
should the government be in a position where it has a viewpoint on
religion? If marriage is suck an
important part of a person's religious life, why should the government be
allowed to place rules upon how that part of a person's life is lived? If we truly believe in religious liberty,
shouldn't the government have no opinion on the institution of marriage?
My basic
argument is this: As long as you are a free thinking adult, the government
should have no opinion on who you marry.
The only interaction that any government in America should have with
marriage is to record the details of that marriage into the public record. That's it.
This is not an argument for gay marriage. This is an argument against the government
having a viewpoint on marriage. Unless
the people involved are unable to make decisions for themselves, the government
should not care is anybody wants to get married to anybody.
The Red Identity There are times that I am really grateful to have access to Twitter and Facebook. Everyday that I log into these social media platforms I receive a reaffirmation of my identity. Everyday that I log into these social media platforms I know again that I am Hunter F. Red. There is a reason that I need this reaffirmation. Ever since I got my new cellphone, the awesome Droid X which is awesome, I keep on getting these calls from people looking for a man named "Tyler". Over and over again, people will call me and ask for "Tyler". Old people, church going people, rednecks, people calling from jail, women who sound attractive, all sorts of people looking for "Tyler". At first I believed that these people were calling the wrong number, but despite the passing of time these calls persisted. It's gotten to the point where I now get more calls looking for "Tyler" than looking for "Hunter". There is a reason I put "Hunter" in quotation marks. Once I realized that people were looking more for "Tyler" than for "Hunter", I began to question things. What if these people are actually looking for me? What if these people are looking for me and asking for who they think I am? What if I actually am Tyler? These pervasive and persistent question rack my brain day and night. I am beginning to question my very identity. I am beginning to question the very foundation of who I am. It's at times like this that I turn to Twitter and Facebook and other places where I established my identity, my identity as Hunter Red. I even look at more concrete places. I reach into my pocket, pull out my wallet, open it up, and look at my driver's license, and the name on it that read- Wait. What? Are you- No. Who the- How come- Huh? Who is this Parker?
The Producer's Cookbook Pierce Tapp is a thirty-eight year old white male. He has long had problems with the control exerted by the federal government, rising immigration rates, and more and more control being taken by people he deems as "impure". Pierce has long thought of taking action to rectify the problem he sees. Now he is doing it. Pierce is in his garage putting together the pieces of his long held dream.
"Okay, I've gone through the long exhaustive process of getting all of the right elements together in just the right amounts. Now, to put them together. First, I need fertilizer. I am not the first to use fertilizer in this fashion, but it seems to have worked out beautifully for people in the past. To act as an explosive agent, gasoline. Not too much gasoline, you don't want to drown out the mixture. Just enough to add the necessary spice. Providing the spark, this blasting cap. Finding blasting caps of a sufficient quality for this project was hard, but it will certainly be worth it. Now, for a container. I guess I'll have to go with this barrel I found out by the oil refinery. I'd like to use an old panel van, but people might be able to find out about the container, connect it to the people who produce it, then the whole thing will be shot to hell. Add in some ball bearing and sharp nails to add some really destructive elements to the mix. Well, there you have it. Once what I have expertly crafted is exposed to the public, the result will be spectacular." Katrina Clemmons is a thirty-five year old female television executive. She has long watched the reality programming on other cable channels. She's seen shows like The Real World, The Bachelor, and I Love Money, and has seen the great success these shows have brought these networks. Now she wants to do it. Now she wants to create a reality show of her own. Katrina is in her office putting together the pieces of her long held dream.
"Okay, I've gone through the long exhaustive process of getting all of the right elements together in just the right amounts. Now, to put them together. First, I need some college students. I am not the first to use college students in this fashion, but it seems to have worked out beautifully for people in the past. To act as an explosive agent, different races. Not too much diversity, you wouldn't want to drown out the mixture of whites, blacks, latinos, and other combustable minorities. Providing the spark, gays. Finding gays of a sufficient flamboyant nature for this project was hard, but it will certainly be worth it. Now, for a place for these people to live. I guess I'll have to go with that loft we found off the 405. I'd like to use that complex in Queens, but people might be able to find out about the complex, connect it to the people who will be producing the show, then the whole thing will be shot to hell. Add in large amounts of alcohol to add some really destructive elements to the mix. Well, there you have it. Once what I have expertly crafted is exposed to the public, the result will be spectacular."
Rainbow Thoughts On Friday night, the New York State Legislature voted to legalize gay marriage in New York state. Many are lauding this as a major breakthrough in gay rights. I, however, am skeptical. As much as I think gay marriage is a great thing and support it being the law of the land, the political junkie in me is raising red flags about this move. The political junkie in me believes that this is just a move done by politicians to give them more material to run on. By that I don't mean giving Democratic politicians more material to run on, I mean giving more material to Republicans. The New York State Legislature is controlled by Republicans, and they, just like every other politician in America, will be running for reelection. It is my honest belief that New York Republicans, as well as other Republicans, will be making gay marriage a central issue in their campaigns. Gay marriage will, once again, become the issue of importance in an election year where we elect a President. The Republicans will attempt to leverage the gay marriage issue to try and gain majorities in the House, Senate, and retake the Presidency. Mark my words.
Take your normal superhero origin story. Guy gets powers, guy realizes he has powers, guy goes out to save the world. Now factor this in: the guy has a score to settle.
Everybody wonders what it is that makes them who they are. The Hawk thought that question was securely answered. However a meeting with a boy in a hospital causes him to question everything. Why he is, who he is, what he is, and even if he is.
Eleven years after the events of Consequences Of Mayorust, The Hawk finds himself dealing with many of the same issues that many of us deal with: A less than satisfying job, co-workers of variant annoyance, and a romantic life is unhealthy at best. Thrust into all this is Madison Medina, a well meaning woman who's adversarial relationship with The Hawk morphs into a kind of friendship. Madison, in addition to learning more about herself and her abilities, help to reveal deeper problems inside the organization both she and The Hawk work for.
In every workplace there is a person. A person who doesn't talk to anyone, has walled themselves socially, and seems openly hostile to everyone. Every workplace has this person, even if you don't know of such a person, they're there. The Black Robin Christmas Carol is the story of one of these people. It delves into who this person is, why this person is, and how this person can change for the better.
There is a story. A story of pain, a story of loss, a story of unspeakable horrors, a story that has not been given it's proper attention. Some are ignoring this story. Some are unaware of this story. Some know of this story but are complicit in it's darkness. This is a story that must be told. Told so that the good can stop it and the bad can feel shame for it.
When I thought up thig blog, the name I first thought up was "Random Bullshit". Quickly I recognized that this name would put some people off. Then I thought of the name "Random Bull****". That seemed to be to much clutter. Then I was inspired with the name that dons this blog today.
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