The Red Interview: Mitch McConnell

A fade in results in the camera seeing two persons sitting in chairs on a soundstage. The two people are pictured above and will be introduced below.

Julia Diana Bobbi- Good evening. Welcome to The Red Interview. I am your host Julia Diana Bobbi. My guest this evening is Mitch McConnell. Mr. McConnell is the senior senator from the state of Kentucky. Senator McConnell lives there with his wife, Elaine, and his three kids. Senator, it's a pleasure to have you here.
Mitch McConnell- Please, the pleasure is all mine.
JDB- Senator, in the last general elections, held in November, the Republican Party took control of the House of Representatives from the Democratic Party. During the run up to this election, your party said that they represent the will of the people-
Mitch McConnell- That isn't exactly what our message was. However, we do feel the election, and the polls that lead up to and have followed the election, reflected the desire of the people for a change. A change away from the decisively left agenda that the Obama Administration took America in, an agenda that has had, as anyone can tell, disastrous effects on our country.
JDB- Yes, but now that the Republican Party has taken control of the House, and continue to wield great influence in the Senate by use of the filibuster, I'm curious as to what, exactly, the Republican Party intends to do with the power they now have?
Mitch McConnell- Well, I can't go into exact details. What I can say is that, unlike the Obama Administration and the Democrats in Washington, we are listening to what the American people want.

Julia is listening to an earpiece. The earpiece is feeding her questions. As she listens to the questions the earpiece is giving her, Julia winces.

JDB- What is that?
Mitch McConnell- The American people want this country to start heading in the right direction. A direction away from the agenda brought to pass by the Obama Administration, and back toward traditional American values.

Julia winces again.

JDB- Can you tell me what you think that is?
Mitch McConnell- The American people want fiscal discipline brought back to Washington.

Julia winces again.

JDB- How do you plan to do that when the Republican Party is insistent that millionaires and billionaires receive, what amounts to, a seven hundred Billion dollar tax credit.
Mitch McConnell- First of all, it is not a tax credit. The current tax rates-
JDB(Wincing)- Put in place by President Bush.
Mitch McConnell- The current tax rates have been in effect for ten years. Businesses can't make plans for the future unless they know what the tax rates are going to be going forward, and it is counterproductive to raise taxes just as we are coming out of this recession. A recession that the policies of the Obama Administration put us in.

Julia listens to her earpiece again. She continues to listen to it for some time.

JDB- Senator McConnell, can you excuse me for a second.
Mitch McConnell- Certainly.

Julia turns toward the camera and says-

JDB- Hunter Red. I know you are watching this from the back. I also know that you are feeding me question via this earpiece I'm wearing. Hunter, I need you to stop swearing. I am not going to ask Senator McConnell those questions in the way that you are phrasing them. Also, stop telling me to tell Senator McConnell that he can blow me. That comment makes no sense coming from a woman.

Julia turns away from the camera and back toward Mitch McConnell.

JDB- My apologies.
Mitch McConnell- No problem, I have to deal with unreasonable liberals all the time.

Just then Hunter Red emerges from the back onto the stage. He gets right into Mitch McConnell's face and says-


Hunter Red then leaves the stage and returns to the back. Julia is left flabbergasted.

JDB- Well. Um- Well.
Mitch McConnell- I also have to deal with unreasonable liberal activists as well.

Hunter Red comes back on stage, this time carrying his iPhone.

Hunter Red- FUCK YOU! If you don't stop fucking lying to these fucking people, I'll- I'll-
Mitch McConnell- You'll what?
Hunter Red- I'll shove this iPhone so far up your ass, you'll be able to play Angry Birds with your small intestine!
Mitch McConnell- Secret Service! This man just threatened.

Five men in black suits enter the stage and physically remove Hunter Red. While this is happening, Hunter Red is continuing to swear and make insinuations that Mitch McConnell is impotent. Julia doesn't quite know what to make of this.

JDB- Well. I bet you wish you could do that with Julian Assange.
Mitch McConnell- Actually, I with I could blow the fuck out of that traitorous Swede.

Julia doesn't quite know what to make of this.

JDB- Well, that's all the time we have here on The Red Interview. I'm Julia Diana Bobbi, reminding you that the internet is not free. You must pay in one way or another. Good night peoples.


Red Theorizes

Theories have been swirling around about the origin of the rape charges levied against Julian Assange. Some people blame the CIA, some people blame the NSA, some people blame MI-6, others see the charges as legitimate. I have another theory.

I first heard of Wikileaks after they posted online several secret Mormon documents(Link to story). These are documents that are given to Bishops in the LDS Church, detailing how many Mormon religious practices are done, that are meant for Bishop's eyes only. These religious practices include baptism for the dead, temple marriage, and the excommunication of members of the church.

After these documents were made public, the LDS Church made a big fuss about it, particularly among media outlets in the Salt Lake area. However, after a while, the controversy over the release of these documents died down. Why would this happen? Why would the LDS Church not pursue the removal of these documents from Wikileaks, and the punishment of the people responsible for the posting? Perhaps they pursued another method to get what they want.

What proof do I have to levy these allegations against the LDS Church? None. What am I basing this on? Rumors and speculation. Do I have any hard evidence to claim what I am claiming? No. So why am I putting this out into the ether? To prove a point. No evidence currently exists to tie the CIA, NSA, or MI-6 to the rape charges currently pending against Julian Assange. Yet, speculation as to their involvement continues swirl around the internet and in the general media. The only reason these rumors continue to exist is the same reason that people generally think that these organizations have nefarious intentions. So, these organizations become the scapegoat for nearly anything that happens. I'm surprised there aren't people saying that the NSA was responsible for the Montreal Screwjob.

The Third Annual Four Star Gaming Awards: Nomination Special

The nomination process is now open for The Third Annual Four Star Gaming Awards, and you the reader can participate! Simply submit your winner in any, or all, of the catagories listed below. You can even submit the reason why you think your choice should win. Nominations for The Third Annual Four Star Gaming Awards will close on Monday, December 20th, with the award ceremony scheduled for Monday, December 27th. You can submit your winner to the following places:

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So, this book is for sale. Yay. It's only $7. Yay. The Black Robin Christmas Carol is also on Kindle. It's $3. Yay. Total sales to this point: 0. Boo.

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