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Best Of 2013
At this time of year many writers reflect on the past year and the things that they have done.  I think this is stupid.  Looking backward results in you having a skewed perspective on what you have done.  Also you can run into shit.

Rather than looking backward like someone who enjoys running into things, I choose to look forward to what will be.  This is the Best Of 2013!!!
And yes, I've done something like this before and this is a recycled bit.  Shut up!
January 20th, 2013-  Bioshock Infinite is delayed.  Again.  No real reason is given for this, at least not one anyone actually believes or understands.  However, we are given more pictures of that hot Russian model chick.  They are awesome.
February 10th 2013-  Pepsico announces a new flavour of Mountain Dew to be released to coincide with Grand Theft Auto V.  The drink is called Guava Taurine Apple Vanilla Mountain Dew.  This concoction sells 100 Million units.
March 10 2013-  On the night of their Lockdown PPV event, Total Non-Stop Action Wrestling announces a new video game based on their wrestling product is in development.  The game is entitled TNA Wrestling: Cross The Line.  Later on it is revealed the game is an iPhone App where you colour in photos taken from TNA live events.  In the game you are encouraged to "Cross The Line" by colouring outside the lines.
April 21st 2013-  Metal Gear Solid 5: Loss Leader is announced.  MGS5:LL becomes the seventh Metal Gear title to be in development.  Later on these seven games are revealed to not actually be in development.  In reality, all "In Development" Metal Gear titles are a result of ideas Hideo Kojima had while high on cough syrup.
May 5th 2013-  Nintendo announces a new sku for the Wii U.  The announcement of the Wii U: Master Edition will promise such features as support for Gamecube games, iTunes Airplay integration, inclusion of Google Maps, and a program that allows you to pay your bills and balance your checkbook.  Upon release of the Wii U: Master Edition, none of the promised features will be included, but have a tentative release date of April 31st, 2014.


June 9th 2013-  Bioshock Infinite is delayed.  Again.  People start comparing Bioshock Infinite to Gran Turismo 5.  Other people make comparisons to Chinese Democracy.  Most people don't get either reference.  Tear.
July 7th 2013-  Electronic Arts buys the WWE license from THQ.  EA immediately starts development on a followup to WCW Backstage Assault.
August 15th 2013-  The serialization of Volume 11 by Hunter Red ends.  No one cares.
September 29th 2013-  Codemasters releases a new Rallycar racing game.  No one in America cares.
October 27th 2013-  Hunter Red announces his retirement from satire.  The Redertainment Corporation Of America announces a replacement writer for redertainment.com.  The replacement is identified as Parker Taupe.
November 3rd 2013-  Hunter Red announces his previous announcement about retiring from satire was itself satire.  Mr. Red makes this announcement after realizing nobody cared about his previous announcement.
December 1st 2013-  Bioshock Infinite is released.  Sorta.  The initial release of Bioshock Infinite includes the first third of the game.  The other two-thirds of Bioshock Infinite is delayed untill a future date.  Full release of Bioshock Infinite is estimated to occur on April 31st, 2014.



Remember, voting is now open for The Fifth Annual The Four Star Awards.  The Fifth Annual The Four Star Awards are scheduled to be unveiled on February 3rd.



A brisk wind whips around the roof of the high rise I find myself on, adding coldness to a dark day, a dark day the mid-afternoon sun is powerless to make lighter.  The rooftop is cold and dark but the offices of the charity housed in this building are darker.

Volume 11 by Hunter Red.  Buy it on Amazon or don't.

Volume 11: Part 2- Dha Chathair: Thursday, September 22nd, 6:31 A.M.


Thursday, September 22nd, 6:31 A.M.
The delivery truck drove most of the night.  The smooth ride and the easy going music the driver was listening to allowed me to get some sleep.  Good thing I'm a light sleeper, otherwise one of the guys unloading the truck would have found me when he was checking the shelf I was hiding on.  This was an early sign of the heightened security at the Dha Chathair Dolore Federal Postal Service Facility.
Once I emerged from the truck, I could see that this facility was no slouch at lighting the place up.  All of the lights in this facility were the kind of fluorescent ones that give bright white light all day and all night, and all of the lights covering all of the facility were on.  The only shadows in this place lay underneath tables or directly underneath people.  There were no dark shadows or deep black corners for me to hide in.  There were, however, skylights.
Spread throughout the ceiling of this facility were skylights that provided natural sunlight and some fresh air to the facility.  What good these skylights did in a facility dominated by artificial light I don't know.  Most of these useless skylights were sitting out in the open, but one was situated above a rack of shelves used for storing equipment.  Scaling this rack was easy but doing so without anyone noticing was hard.  I nearly got spotted at the top but I pulled my shoe back just in time.  As I lay on my back, lying next to scarcely used tools covered in dust, I began to examine the skylight.
The skylight seemed to be made of repurposed heating ducts, which are hard to climb up in a silent manner.  The repurposed heating ducts also appeared to be wet, mostly due to the fact that the vents installed to allow airflow was allowing rain in.
When I realized I couldn't get out through the skylight, I got frustrated and kicked the shelf I was laying on.  This caused one of the tools on the shelf to fall and loudly clang on the concrete floor.  I was sure that this would lead to my capture.  I was sure someone would investigate the noise, someone would look up on the shelf I was on, and someone would find me.  I was in a full panic.  My mind was racing, thinking of the thousands of different ways, both possible and impossible, for me to save myself.  No one found me.  No one investigated the noise.  I don't think anybody even noticed the tool falling.  Still, that didn't help my panic go away.
There are breathing exercises you can do to slow down your heart rate down, but those exercises are difficult to do if you can't control your breathing.  While I was trying to stop myself from hyperventilating, something my Dad said to me came to mind.  "Hato, you think too straight ahead.  You think of one solution to a problem then you go after it, even if there are clearly better solutions lying in front of you.  You need to slow down.  You need to look around more.  You need to use your brain more in situations."  Admittedly that conversation aggravated me at the time, as did any other time Dad criticized me, but that conversations served me well at that moment.
My breath and heart rate eventually calmed down and I began to slowly look around and assess the situation I was in.  I saw a row of windows, but saw I could not open them unless I broke them.  There were several fire exits, but I didn't really want to set off the fire alarm as I made my exit.  Then I noticed something peculiar about one of the security doors.  Like most good security doors, you need a keycard in order to open the door to enter the building.  However, unlike many security doors, you did not need a keycard to get out of the building.  People, mostly employees who were usually dressed like I am, just pushed on the door and left the building.
The plan for me to leave the postal facility was this: Climb down off the rack I was laying on, walk over to the security door, and walk out.  That's it.  Just that easy.  Way easier than shimming up a skylight and then trying to get down without breaking something.  Executing this plan was also easy.  Well, as easy as walking out of a busy security door while not making eye contact with anyone can be, which is easier when the employees seem to be more interested in getting the fuck out of the facility than in socializing.
It was dark out when I exited the facility, which gave me an ominous feeling about the city I had just traveled to.  I walked around the streets of Dha Chathair for a while trying in vain to find my bearings.  After realizing how thoroughly lost I was, I decided to change my perspective on the city.  I found a square with several tall buildings in them and chose the tallest one to climb.  Getting to the top of this building took longer than normal, not because it was harder to climb but because this building was taller than any of the buildings in Moenia Prima.  Looking around I could see that Dha Chathair was bigger than my hometown.  There were more tall buildings to climb on, more large groups of people to hide myself in, and more billboards featuring more lovely women for me to stare at.
As I sit on top of this really tall building in Dha Chathair, I don't know where exactly to go.  I don't know how I'm going to continue in my journey to Amcan to tell the world of what's going on in Moenia Prima.  What I do know is I can see a building with a symbol that matches the symbol on the church my family and I went to.  That looks rather inviting.
Later.
Hato Shurtleff

Volume 11: Part 2- Dha Chathair: Introduction


Part 2
Dha Chathair


Introduction
Founded in 1847, the city of Dha Chathair was originally settled to capitalize on the fertile lands that fill this area of Dolore.  After the discovery of oil deposits in nearby Cookland, the population of Dha Chathair exploded between the years 1859 and 1872, increasing from 5,790 to 91,827.  The population of Dha Chathair has continues to climb steadily ever since.  Before the situation currently going on in Dolore flared up, the last Dolorian census, conducted in 2010, estimated the population of Dha Chathair to be 1,110,046.
With the influx of people came an influx of ministers, bishops, preachers, and other clergyman who sought to spread the word of their faith.  Over time, the predominant religion in Dha Chathair became The Church of the Holy God.  A dispute over the focal point of the faith caused a fracturing in 1910, leading to the establishment of The Church Of The Lord, The One And Only Son Of God.  Just seven years later, The Church Of The Lord, The One And Only Son Of God became the dominant religion in Dha Chathair, both in membership and prevalence among politicians and other powerful persons.
Dha Chathair boasts a robust economy with many heavy players in the defense and banking industries being headquartered in one of the city's high rise buildings.  In addition, the high population of people under the age of twenty-five leads to a strong educational sector.  The prevalence of religious people also leads to a high number of faith based companies being centered in Dha Chathair.
Starting in about 1983, Dha Chathair started to become a media center in Dolore.  With three news organizations, four daily newspapers, and two twenty-four hour cable news organizations based in the city, Dha Chathair stands as the central hub for news in Dolore.  The biggest news source in Dha Chathair is Untitled Corporation.  Untitled Corporation is the owner, publisher, and distributer of The Dha Chathair Times, the largest newspaper in Dolore, The Financial Times, a spinoff of the Dha Chathair Times that focuses on financial news, and Sly 7, a twenty-four hour cable news channel.  Despite criticism of being biased in favor of conservatives, or perhaps because if it's bias, Sly 7 is the leading news channel on cable, averaging 55% of the total audience who is watching news.
The demographic breakdown of the population of Dha Chathair is very similar to the rest of Dolore.  71% of the population of Dha Chathair is verbrecher, while 29% is opfer.  Although, much like the rest of Dolore, the percentage of the population that identifies as opfer has been increasing over the past decade.
There is an aspect of the racial demographic that plays a role in the situations currently going on in Dolore.  Amongst citizens who identify as members of The Church Of The Lord, The One And Only Son Of God, 93% are verbrecher while 7% are opfer.  Amongst citizens who identify as members of the Church of the Holy God, 68% are opfer while 32% are verbrecher.
Vince Fielding, reporter VBNS

The Fifth Annual The Four Star Awards Nomination Special


The time has come.  The process of compiling nominees has been going on all year, but now the nominees can be unveiled to a public tasked to participate.  The time has come for The Fifth Annual The Four Star Awards!!!
The Fifth Annual The Four Star Awards
In a departure from previous years, The Fifth Annual The Four Star Awards will give awards to the worst of the worst.  The worst games, movies, music, people, and TV shows.  Nominees were decided based on Meticritic scores, public scorn, media scorn, and the personal opinions of the employees of The Redertainment Corporation Of America.

There are five nominees for every category to be voted upon.  Voting can be done at The Fifth Annual The Four Star Awards Facebook Page.  Voting is open now.  Winners will be determined on February 2nd, just before The Fifth Annual The Four Star Awards goes live on Sunday, February 3rd.  Voting is free to anyone who is on Facebook.  There will also be a final overall category, nominees for which will come from the winners of the other categories.

Here are your nominees for The Fifth Annual The Four Star Awards:
Worst Movie
Joyful Noise, 1000 Words, The Twilight Saga: Breaking Dawn: Part 2, That's My Boy, The Watch
Worst Video Game
Amy, The Expendables 2 (Video Game), Fray, Gettysburg: Armored Warfare
Worst Music
LMFAO, Carly Rae Jepsen, Chris Brown, Marilyn Manson, Hank Williams Jr.,
Worst TV Show
Work It, Dance Moms, Toddlers And Tiaras, Here Comes Honey Boo Boo Child, Bristol Palin: Life's A Trip
Worst Personality
Rush Limbaugh, Keith Olbermann, Rick Scott, Scott Walker, Todd Akin


Voting is open now.  If you are displeased with the nominees provided, create your own damn award show.






THQ Drowns Under Giant Purple Dilldo Bats
I remember one time coming upon a situation that has always stayed in my mind.  It was a pond with two people at it.  One was in the water, the other wasn't.  The person in the water was thrashing about, trying to stay afloat, in total distress.  The person not in the water was watching the other and doing nothing.  Eventually the person in the water went underneath the water, dying as a result, and the person not in the water did nothing.  I did nothing as well, but I was listening to In The Air Of The Night, which I mistakenly believed mirrored the situation I was observing.
What does the paragraph above have to do with anything?  This week, THQ filed for bankruptcy.  After much struggling, thrashing about, and desperately trying to help itself, THQ drowned under the weight of it's debt.  And we all watched it happen.  And laughed.  And hit people with giant purple dilldo bats.
As Phil Collins once said, "You're fucking the painter!"  So true.  So true.

Volume 11: Part 1- Moenia Prima: Wednesday, September 21st, 8:38 P.M.


Wednesday, September 21st, 8:38 P.M.
Sparra explained to me once how the Dolore Federal Postal Service works.  He said, "When mail is sent out, first it goes to a central mail processing center, located in every major city.  If the mail is addressed to a city served by that facility, the mail is processed in house.  If the mail is addressed to a city served by a different facility, the mail is sent, by plane or truck, to that facility to be processed."
Even though that conversation had nothing to do with what we were talking about at the time, it was a great help to me now.  Now I know what I have to do to get to Dha Chathair.  All I have to do is sneak into a secure Dolore Federal Postal Service facility, get into the back of an outgoing truck, hide myself in said truck, and catch a free ride to where I want to go.  That sounds difficult, but it is really easy for someone highly trained in the art of osher.  It's also easy for someone who's friend let them into the facility and while they were in there they spent time studying the facility's layout.
Getting inside a secure federal facility is usually difficult.  Key cards to get in, fences topped with razor wire, and motion sensitive lights make the building incredibly imposing.  However, if your employees fiddle with a door so that they don't have to unlock a door every time they want to take a smoke break, that creates a major hole in your security.  After I got in, I had to make sure that no one would spot me as I made my way over to the outbound delivery trucks.  The big halogen lights that hang in the roof of the facility would have made this hard if all of them had been on.  Fortunately, as a cost saving measure, most of the big lights were turned off, allowing the facility to be light with much less expensive natural light.  I snuck into the facility at about dusk, giving me a lot of long dark shadows to conceal myself in.
The biggest obstacle I had to overcome was which truck I would hide in.  Obviously the trucks weren't labeled with which city they were going to, so I thought I was going to have to either listen to the driver's conversations or guess.  As I was scanning the transportation area, I found a large board with many pieces of paper on it.  On these papers were all the trucks, where they were going, and when exactly they were leaving.  So, that took the guess work out of what I thought was my biggest obstacle.  This whole thing was so easy I was sure I was walking into a trap.
Once I got into the correct truck going toward my desired destination, I found a pair of shelves on either side of the truck.  I found myself a place on the highest shelf where I felt I wouldn't be discovered.  Upon reflection this was an unreasonable assumption, but it worked.  As the truck pulled out of the postal facility and on its way to its destination, I said a silent prayer.  Hopefully God will shine on my and his hand will guide me in my mission to save my people.  I don't know what God has in store for me and the rest of the people in Dolore, but I pray it's better than what's just happened.
Later.
Hato Shurtleff

Volume 11: Part 1- Moenia Prima: Wednesday, September 21st, 1:48 P.M.


Wednesday, September 21st, 1:48 P.M.
It took me a while to recount what happened this morning in my journal.  It took me less time to decide how I should move forward.  The story of what's going on in this town must be told and it must be told in a way that will reach people who will do something about it.  I'm going to go to Amcan in the country of Velas.  I'm going to find the Velas Broadcast News Service and I'm going to tell them of what I've seen.  I also know how I'm going to get to Amcan,  or at least I thought I did.
When I moved the panel and emerged from the compartment I was in, Valerie's body was sill lying on her bed.  Her eyes, once so full of life and hope, were now still and hollow.  It's strange to look at someone you once found so alluring who is now dead, their body desecrated with violence.  To experience this twice in two days is indescribable.
My plan was to take Valerie's car, follow the route laid out by my Hipster's map program, and get to Amcan over the course of several days.  Sure, I don't know how to drive a car, but it can't be that hard.  Hell, the only reason we don't allow monkeys to drive is because the amount of excrement thrown out of car windows on the freeway would go down.  Valerie's keys were in her purse which I found on a broken table in the kitchen.  Before I left, I thought I should say something to Valerie, if only to settle my conscience.
"Valerie, I thought I should tell you before I left that I'm taking your car.  I know I should of helped you when Mr. Furcifer was attacking you.  I see now the fight I was hearing in that compartment you hid me in.  There is no explanation for why I didn't help you.  There is no excuse.  The only thing I can say is that I will bring people back here.  I hope doing that will lead to you telling me you forgive me in heaven a very long time from now."
After I made my peace, I set off for Dha Chathair.  At least, that is what I intended to do.  As I was about to leave, I looked out the smashed front window at Valerie's car.  The car didn't look good before, which is why I guess Valerie used to take the bus to work, but the car looked even worse with its windows smashed, hood caved in, and tires slashed.  Clearly, I wasn't going to be driving this car to Dha Chathair, or anywhere for that matter.
I needed to think about how I was going to get to where I wanted to go.  Usually when I need to think about something, I use music as a kind of lubricant.  My Hipster has a built in crappy speaker, so I started flipping around and listening to whatever music came up.  One of the songs I fell upon was Candyass by Klavier.  All of the memories I have of Klavier in some way involve Sparra.  The concert we went to together, the trip we took where all we listened to was Klavier, the many, MANY, times he declared the guitarist of Klavier to be the Siren of rock and roll, those memories ring out like the Klavier bell that Sparra bought online.
Listening to Klavier and remembering Sparra gave me an idea of how I can get to Dha Chathair.  I still need to sort out the details of this plan, but once I do it will be an awesome feat in itself.
Later.
Hato Shurtleff

I Got Nothing


For now, I invite you to go up to the house. Get something to eat, maybe take a shower and get a fresh change of clothes, and, most importantly, relax for a bit. What you've been through I wouldn't wish on myself or, for that matter, anyone.

Volume 11 by Hunter Red.  Available now in ways that allow you to read it.

Also available from Hunter Red The Black Robin Christmas Carol, The Hawk, and The Hawk: Consequences Of Mayorust.  Buy them because of reasons.


#ProjectBeacon

Volume 11: Part 1- Moenia Prima: Wednesday, September 21st, 6:49 A.M.


Wednesday, September 21st, 6:49 A.M.
Every other time I've approached Valerie's home early in the morning I had an illicit through in my mind.  This time I didn't.  This time I needed help, and I thought Valerie was the person who could help me.  I needed someone to help me get to Dha Chathair.  I needed someone to help me see my parents again.
I didn't get much sleep between what I found at Delany's apartment and getting over to Valerie's house.  The sound of Valerie turning on her radio to listen to the news awoke me from me nearly forty-five minute slumber.  Approaching the front door wasn't a good idea because I didn't want to take the chance of being exposed.  Instead I knocked on Valerie's back door just as she was finishing her shower.
"Hello," Valerie implored at the mysterious knocking.  I knocked again.  "Hello?  Is somebody there?"
In a small strong voice I said, "Valerie.  It's Hato.  I need your help."
"Hato?"  Valerie walked over to her back door and opened it up.  "What are you doing here?"  All Valerie has on was her bath towel.
"Um, I'm sorry about disturbing you before you got dressed, but I need help and you're the only one left."  I don't know if it was my fractured speaking or my sad complexion, but I somehow got through to Valerie.
"Take a seat in the kitchen while I get changed real quick."  The Velas Broadcast News Service was playing in Valerie's kitchen as I took my seat in it.  They were reporting about green technology and new techniques to make pasta for Velasian cuisine, not a word about what was going on in Moenia Prima.  Valerie started talking to me as she was changing in her bedroom.  "So, why are you coming to me for help?  Where are Solanin and Belle?"
"Last time I saw them they were getting in their car and heading for Dha Chathair.  I don't know if they've made it or not."
"Why didn’t you go with them?"
"I wanted to gather some of my friends and go with them."
"Okay, so where are they?"
"I'm pretty sure Sparra is gone, the manager at Wanda's strip club told me that, although I hesitate to believe him.  I just came from Delany's apartment."
Valerie came out of her bedroom.  She was dressed and struggling to put on her watch.  "What about her, why can't she help you?"
My face turned downward as I responded to Valerie's question.  This is something people do when they're about to say something bad.  "I found Delany in her apartment.  She was in the back bedroom, behind what looked to be a mountain of hastily put together obstacles.  The bedroom looked to be brutally ravaged and torn to shreds.  Delany looked the same.  The difference between Delany and the room I found her in is Delany looked like she had put up a fight as those savages did what they did to her."
I looked up and saw Valerie standing before me.  The look on her face betrayed the sunny sundress she was wearing.  "Oh God.  I'm so sorry Hato.  I can't imagine what it's like.  Between your brother being killed and now your friends, I'm just so sorry."  Valerie gave me a hug as I sat at her kitchen table.  The warmth of her body as she embraced me made me feel good.  I think I felt a couple of tears fall on my head and Valerie held me.  Valerie let me go, wiped a couple of tears from her eyes and said, "Okay, I'll help you.  What do you need?"
"I need to get ride to Dha Chathair.  I think I can figure out how to get there, I was just counting on either Sparra or Wanda having a car."
"So you need my car?"
"I need a car.  Whether it's yours or somebody else, I just need a car to get to Dha Chathair."
"Do you know how to drive a car?"  There was a playful accusatory tone in Valerie's voice as she said that.
"I'm aware of how to drive, but I haven't done it in a couple of years."
"So, how were you planning to drive to Dha Chathair?"
I thought for a moment then responded.  "I think I can use the skills I learned in that racing game I suck at to help me get there."
Valerie lightly chuckled at that comment.  "I'll take you to Dha Chathair.  Let me go dig out my road maps and we'll be off."
Hearing Valerie say maps, I started fishing around in my pockets.  "Wait, I have a map program on my Hipster."  It was when I was digging around when someone knocked loudly on Valerie's front door.
"I wonder who that could be this time in the morning?"  The person knocked loudly again.  "Whoever it is certainly is impatient.  Who is it?"
"Valerie!  Open up, we need to talk."  The person at the door was Mr. Furcifer, his loud booming voice sent Valerie into a panic.
"Shit!  Hato, we need to hide you."
I didn't see the need to panic.  "Why?"
As she jerked me out of the chair and shoved me into her bedroom, in a stifled tone Valerie said, "Because Allen is one of the people going around killing opfers.  If he finds you here, I'm toast."  Once I was in her bedroom, Valerie yelled back toward the door, "Hang on, I'm not decent."
I started looking around for a place to hide.  "Should I hide underneath your bed or squeeze in behind your dresser?"
Valerie was moving clothes around in her closet.  "Will you quit joking around."  A sound came out of the closet.  When I looked at it I saw that Valerie had slid the back panel of her closet away, revealing a compartment behind her closet.
"What is that for?"
"Does it matter?  Get in!"  I stepped into the compartment and Valerie slid the panel back into place.  "Don't worry Hato.  I'll get rid of Allen then we'll be on our way.  It won't take long."
"Okay."  Settling into my hiding place, I started using my Hipster to plot out the course we would take to Dha Chathair.  The light from my Hipster allowed me to see what Valerie kept in her secret compartment.  For a teacher, Valerie had some good booze.  There was a small hole in the panel which allowed me to look into Valerie's bedroom.  I could see only her bed, her dresser/vanity, and the outside edge of her bedroom door frame.  I couldn't see much but I could hear everything.
After she turned off the radio and fiddled with her hair in her mirror, Valerie entered her front room and answered her front door.  "Allen, what do you want?"
I could hear Mr. Furcifer loudly and clearly.  "Get out of my way."  Mr. Furcifer forced his way into Valerie's home.
"Please come in Allen."
Mr. Furcifer was stomping around Valerie's house.  He would take a couple of steps, stop, take a couple more steps, stop, then take a couple of more steps and stop.  "Where is he?"
"Who?"
"You know who."
"That secret boyfriend you think I have."
There was the high pitched sound of something going through the air before I hear something hit like a ship against Valerie's hardwood floor.  "Don't fuck with me."  Mr. Furcifer walked around and peered into Valerie's bedroom.  He gave me a good fright as he looked around for what felt like a long time before retreating back into the front room.  "You know, I ran into Hato's parents yesterday, you know Sakoshi and Belle."
"Solanin."
"What?"
"Hato's father's name is Solanin.  Sakoshi is the name of the boy you killed, who incidentally is Hato's brother."
"The fuck I care.  Anyway, I ran into Solanin and Belle yesterday as they were leaving their house.  I wasn't the only one that ran into them, there was a group of us.  After we took care of them, I walked-"
"Wait, what do you mean by-"
The high pitched sound was heard again before I heard something thud against what sounded like Valerie's couch.  There was a lot of anger in Mr. Furcifer's voice when he said, "Don't interrupt me.  Anyway, I walked up to-"
"Is that the pointing stick you used to kill Sakoshi?"
This time something hit one of the walls.  "Yes it is!  Interrupt me again and you'll taste it's sting.  Anyway, after we took care of Solanin and Belle, I walked up to their house, looking for Hato.  I looked all around that house for him.  I went through every room, the attic, the cellar, turned some things over for the fuck of it, but couldn't find him.  I was thinking over it was I watched all those damn fretons play outside, then I remembered something.  Who is someone that Hato can go to for help?  Who is someone that has helped Hato before?"
There was a short tenuous pause.  "What are you looking at me for?"
From the effect Mr. Furcifer put on his voice, it was clear he was trying to sound intimidating and evil.  "Valerie, you are going to tell me where Hato Shurtleff is, and you are going to tell me now."
"I don't know."
"Valerie, tell me where Hato Shurtleff is."
"I don't know."
"Tell me now."
"I don't know.  I haven't seen Hato since Monday when you killed his brother."
"Liar!"  Mr. Furcifer then used his pointing stick, the pointing stick he killed my brother with, to whip and smash what sounded like Valerie's front window.  "You lying bitch.  How dare you betray your people.  How dare you help that freton.  How dare you protect that criminal opfer scum.  You're hiding him, aren’t you?  I bet you're hiding him in this house!"
"How?  Look at how small this place is.  Where am I hiding him, the roof?"
Mr. Furcifer whipped the wall again, this time causing something that hung on it to fall to the floor.  "Then you sent him off.  Sent him off to one of your friends.  Sent him off to a reporter from that damn news service you always listen to, a news service that slanders the glorious work we verbrechers are doing to protect Dolore."
"I haven't sent him off somewhere because I haven't seen him."
"Liar!"  This time, after Mr. Furcifer whipped something, Valerie called out in pain.  "Don't you lie to me again, bitch.  Where is he?"
"You think I won't fight back, don't you?  That I'll just give in to what you want.  I'm not changing my story because it's the truth.  Hato isn't here."
Whip.  "Liar!"  Whip.  "Bitch!"  Whip.  "Whore!"
There was a collision and a crash.  "Yeah!  How do you like that?  How do you like a woman standing up against you?"
There was a more violent collision and a louder crash.  "Now you're going to get it!"  The sound of Mr. Furcifer driving Valerie into a wall and Valerie crying out in pain.  Then Valerie being driven into the wall again, and again, then the sound of clothing being torn, then the driving sound again.  Each successive sound of violence kept on getting closer and closer and closer.  "You are going to fucking tell me where that fucking freton is hiding or I will fucking kill you.  Don't fuck with me."
It was after Mr. Furcifer made his murderous threat that Valerie stumbled into her bedroom and into my field of vision.  She did not look good.  Her sundress was torn, tattered, and barely hanging on her.  She was bleeding from cuts on her arms and face.  There were welts from Allen's repeated whippings on Valerie's face, neck, and chest.  Valerie stumbled over to her dresser when Mr. Furcifer entered the room.  Based on his physical state, Mr. Furcifer clearly had the upper hand in this fight.
Valerie was gasping for air when she saw Mr. Furcifer behind her in the mirror.  There was a deadly terror in Valerie's eyes when she saw him.  "Allen, you don't have to do this."
"Yes, Valerie, I do."  In a flash, Allen closed the distance between him and Valerie, grabbed her head and slammed it into the glass mirror.  The first impact didn't break the mirror, the second did, the third broke it further, and the fourth even further.  "Where is he?"  Smash.  "Where is he!"  Smash.  Seeing the violent combination of skin, blood, and glass made my stomach turn.  As Valerie was pawing around on the top of her dresser, Mr. Furcifer said, "If you don't tell me where Hato is, I'll kill you just like I killed his parents!"
Hearing that made just about caused me to get involved.  I was preparing to try and move the panel that concealed me in the compartment I was hiding in when Valerie made her move.  Valerie mule kicked Mr. Furcifer, sending Allen stumbling backward, then Valerie picked up a piece of the mirror that had just been broken and slashed Mr. Furcifer's face.  Being wounded by Valerie caused Mr. Furcifer to scream out in pain for the first time in this confrontation.  Rather than feeling the pain and recoiling from it's sting, Mr. Furcifer saw Valerie turning around to slash him as an opportunity.  The opportunity he had been waiting for.
After she had finished her slashing arc, Mr. Furcifer grabbed Valerie by the throat with both hands.  The first outward expression of the kind of hold Mr. Furcifer had on Valerie is when Valerie’s eyes opened wide, nearly popping out of place.  Valerie kicked and punched and flailed around, but the grip remained.  Mr. Furcifer's hold on his victim became more strong, more secure, more intense as he lifted her from her feet.  Once he got his victim to a sufficient height, Mr. Furcifer pivoted untill he could slam Valerie on her bed.  This gave him more leverage.  Valerie tried like mad to stop what was happening, but slowly her back lost its arch.  Slowly her arms fell limp.  Slowly her legs began to dangle off the edge of her bed.  Slowly Valerie ceased.
It was a long time after Valerie stopped fighting that Mr. Furcifer loosed his grip.  He stood in front of his victim, arms covered in blood, breathing as if taunting the Valerie that she could not.  Among the blood on Allen’s face, both his and his victim’s, was a smile.  A smile that grew as he looked upon his fallen prey.  Allen left Valerie's bedroom, traveled through the front room, and opened the door.  Before he left, Allen said this: "Hato.  I know you're here, Hato.  I want you to know something Hato.  We will find you.  We found your brother.  We found your father.  We found your mother.  We found them and we killed them, just like we will do to you.  You opfers are a scourge, and we verbrechers and here to cleanse this world of you."  Then, mercifully, he left.
I don't know how I feel right now.  There's an element of fear in what I feel but there's also a feeling of defiance in me.  These people, these verbrechers, seek to kill my family, my people, my race.  I must survive.  No, I must do more than that, I must stop them.  How I can stop them is a question I haven't answered yet, but I do know this: I can't stop them here.  I can't stop them in this compartment.  I can't stop them in Moenia Prima.  I must leave this place.  I must seek out people who will help me help my people.  I must do this.  I.
I don't know how I will stop the verbrechers from slaughtering my people.  What I do know is that what Mr. Furcifer said about finding a reporter from the Velas Broadcast News Service does sound intriguing.
Hato Shurtleff

Volume 11: Part 1- Moenia Prima: Wednesday, September 21, 12:02 A.M.


Wednesday, September 21, 12:02 A.M.
God damn it.  God damn it.  I mean- I just- Fuck.  Damn it all to hell.
Why didn't I go here first?  Why wasn't this the first place I looked?  Why was I not here to stop here- these- these fucking savages.
Where am I going to go now?  Who can I could on?  Who's left?  How am I going to get out of this fucking place?
Fuck.  God damn it.
Hato Shurtleff

English 2030- Final Project


            World of Warcraft, also referred to as WoW, is a massively multiplayer online role-playing game (MMORPG) released by Blizzard Entertainment in November 2004.  World of Warcraft has a subscriber base of ten million, the largest amount among role-playing games of its type.  In World of Warcraft, teams of players gather to tackle dungeons, complete missions, which is known as raiding, or to accrue experience for their characters, known as leveling.  Communication is a key part of playing World of Warcraft.  Players of World of Warcraft communicate both inside and outside of the online game experience in order to better co-ordinate with each other, plan out strategy, or just as friends.
            There are people who are intimidated by World of Warcraft.  They watch videos of the game being played and see images that can be very hard for someone unfamiliar with the game to understand.  People who are not familiar with World of Warcraft can also hear people who play the game talk about the game and become more apprehensive toward this product.  Some may argue that this is purposeful, that the language used by people who actively play World of Warcraft is designed to keep people away from the game.  Is this really the case?  Is the language that is used by active player of World of Warcraft truly exclusionary?
In order to attempt to answer this question, I chose to listen to a group of people who actively play World of Warcraft talk about the game.  For this purpose, I chose to listen to a podcast produced independently of Blizzard Entertainment, produced instead by a group of people who play World of Warcraft.  The Best Little Horde House In Azeroth, or Horse House for short, is a podcast focused on World of Warcraft.  The hosts of the podcast talk about news, issues, and their own experiences playing World of Warcraft.  The purpose of Horde House is for the hosts to gather and talk about their experiences playing World of Warcraft, and also to give other players of World of Warcraft something to listen to that pertains to the game.  For this paper, episodes seventy-four, seventy-five, seventy-six, and seventy-seven are used as material.
            The regular hosts for the show are Rob, Shane Xtopher, and Grandpa.  Rob and Xtopher are present for all four of the episodes used for this paper.  Shane is present for episodes seventy-four, seventy-six, and seventy-seven.  Grandpa is present for episodes seventy-four, seventy-five, and seventy-six.  A special guest host named Sunshine is present during episode seventy-five.  The hosts of the show seem to have a lot of experience and knowledge about World of Warcraft.
The Best Little Horde House In Azeroth is a show that integrates the internet into the production and execution of the show.  The hosts of the show call each other, using the online telecommunication program Skype.  Each of the hosts brings a news story, obtained from the internet, which is presented and discussed.  Listeners of the show can interact with the show either through the show’s Email, Twitter, or Facebook segments.  The program is recorded and disseminated by one of the hosts, most likely Rob.
            One kind of language to be explained is the way that patches are explained.  A patch is a piece of software designed to fix problems with, or update a computer program or its supporting data.  During episode seventy-four of The Best Little Horde House In Azeroth, Shane describes the latest patch to World of Warcraft like this:

Shane- Yeah, this isn’t big news though.  This is just a little news story called “They Updated The Game With A New Patch”.  It’s a very minor patch, 5.0.5, and most of it seems to be tool tip corrections, because of the random rebalancing they’ve been doing constantly to the game.  But there are a couple of neat bug fixes that people can appreciate, like the spell graphic for the Arcane Bomb during the, uh, Queen Azshara encounter, and, um, you know that instance, that stupid one, Eternity.  It’s been reduced to what they call a reasonable size, because if you’ve played that instance since the patch came out, 5.0.4, it takes up, like, the entire screen.  I think it goes on a little bit to the wall behind my computer monitor.
(Rob, Xtopher, Shane, & Grandpa, The Best Little Horse House In Azeroth- Episode 74- Quit being so fat, you guys!, 2012)

            Shane is basing his description of the effect of the patch from the World of Warcraft Patch 5.0.5 Notes and is also adding in some of his own experience.  While Shane is describing the effect of the patch in a way that some people may not understand, it can be argued that Shane is merely cutting through the technical jargon that is found in the source material.  This is an excerpt of the World of Warcraft Patch 5.0.5 Notes, including the section Shane referencing the Arcane Bomb:
Bug Fixes
·                     Well of Eternity
·                     The spell graphic for Arcane Bomb during the Queen Azshara encounter has been reduced to a reasonable size.
                        Ulduar
·                     The Silence and Pacify effects from Conservator's Grip are now removed from players once they step within the appropriate area radius of a Healthy Spore mushroom.
                        Dragon Soul
·                     Player pets should no longer experience pathing issues when attacking Deathwing's Arm Tentacles.
·                     Congealing Bloods now move at slower base speed.
                        Master Looters can again assign loot to players in other groups within a raid.
                        The Refer-A-Friend Summon should again function as expected.
                        Worgen players on pre-Cataclysm accounts should be able to accept and complete all Gilneas quests.
                        Players should again be able to teleport out of the Firelands Hatchery in Hyjal if they have completed Aessina's Miracle.
                        Players should be able to use the new Fishing spell where appropriate.
                        Crossing coalesced zone boundaries should not duplicate profession recipes.
                        Players should no longer inappropriately receive the "Requires master riding skill" or "Requires artisan riding skill" errors when attempting to mount certain mounts.
                        Items in the Auction House UI should no longer display in reverse order when sorted.
                        The PvP node capture bar should be back in expected locations such as Wintergrasp, Tol Barad and Venture Bay.
                        Players should no longer be placed into battlegrounds that they have downvoted while queueing for a Random battleground.
                        Flying over Wintergrasp when no battle is active should no longer cause a forced dismount.
                        Accepting a quest that flags you for PvP combat should no longer prevent you from accepting further quests.
                        Resolved a Mac issue related to CPU usage.
                        As he deserves, Crithto should now be attackable by both Alliance and Horde players.
                        (Kaivax, 2012)

            The language seen in these patch notes assumes the reader has a high level of knowledge about the things being references, as well as a small amount of technical knowledge.  The use of this kind of language is not unique to Blizzard Entertainment and World of Warcraft.  This is a small section of how Apple describes the security updates made in the latest patch to the iTunes software, 10.7:
iTunes 10.7
§     WebKit
Available for: Windows 7, Vista, XP SP2 or later
Impact: Visiting a maliciously crafted website may lead to an unexpected application termination or arbitrary code execution
Description: Multiple memory corruption issues existed in WebKit. These issues are addressed through improved memory handling.
CVE-ID
CVE-2011-3016 : miaubiz
CVE-2011-3021 : Arthur Gerkis
CVE-2011-3027 : miaubiz
CVE-2011-3032 : Arthur Gerkis
CVE-2011-3034 : Arthur Gerkis
CVE-2011-3035 : wushi of team509 working with iDefense VCP, Arthur Gerkis
CVE-2011-3036 : miaubiz
(Apple Inc., 2012) This description of the security update goes on for several pages in this kind of form.

            This is how Adobe describes the 11.5 Update to Adobe Flash Player:
ADOBE FLASH PLAYER 11.5 (WIN AND MAC) AND 11.2 (LINUX) - 32 BIT AND 64 BIT DEBUGGER (AKA DEBUG PLAYER OR CONTENT DEBUGGERS) AND STANDALONE (AKA PROJECTORS) PLAYERS FOR FLEX AND FLASH DEVELOPERS.
11/6/2012 – Updated debugger and standalone versions of Flash Player. These players contain fixes for critical vulnerabilities identified in Security Bulletin APSB12-24 . The latest versions are 11.5.502.110 (Win and Mac), 11.3.276.12 (Windows 8) and 11.2.202.251 (Linux). All users are encouraged to update to these latest versions.
(Adobe Systems Incorporated, 2012)

            While this kind of complex technical language used to describe software updates seems to be common among most computer companies, a question arises if this language is also common among video game companies.  Assassin’s Creed III is a video game released on October 30th, 2012 by the Canadian based developer Ubisoft.  This is an excerpt of how Ubisoft describes the Assassin’s Creed III Thanksgiving Patch:
Multiplayer

Multiplayer Modes
- ASSASSINATE - Instances where it was possible for players to kill players that were not their target in Assassinate have been corrected.
- ASSASSINATE - Bodyguards no longer fail to stun when they are locked by the pursuer of the player they protect.
- DEATHMATCH - In Fort Wolcott, fixed a bug where players would remained stuck on warmup screen.
- MANHUNT - The cooldown boosts for loss streak bonus are not permanently active for all abilities during a manhunt round anymore.

Multiplayer Abilities
- Loss Streak now correctly triggers when players lose their contracts five times in a row.
- Disruption now breaks the hitting player’s lock.
- The Smoke Bomb’s drop behavior has been updated. It now drops at the user’s feet instead of dropping in front of them. However, if players drop it from a ledge, it will drop below them.
- Throwing Knives used against players hiding in haystacks will now make them get out of this haystack.
- Using Throwing Knives against a target now prevents the target from contesting the kill.
- Players are no longer stuck after using the Money Bomb from a ledge.

Multiplayer Ladders
- Several issues which occurred when players would quit a Manhunt pre-session lobby and join their friends the same session later have been corrected.
- After a session ends on a draw, both teams will now receive the same rate for Abstergo ladder, instead of one team getting a winning rate and the other getting a losing rate.
- Players are now granted Abstergo points normally even if one or several players get the idle state at the end of the session (The idle players do not get any Abstergo points)

Multiplayer Misc
- It is now possible for players to lock their target when their target has just stunned them.
- Changing the ability set three times during a game can no longer reset the ability’s cooldown.
- The X icon no longer inaccurately persistently displays.
- It is no longer possible for players to get up and perform a kill under certain conditions while they’re vulnerable.
- Transitions to join Multiplayer sessions after an invite now work correctly.
- Warm up games are no longer interrupted when the host player leaves.
- It is now possible to stun a vulnerable pursuer.
- The X icon no longer displays above the pursuer’s previous target when they have been stunned after being vulnerable. 
(FredEx919, 2012)

The kind of complex technical jargon may be difficult for even people with knowledge of the product being described to understand, much less people who are new to the product.  Shane’s attempt to cut through the jargon allows people who may not readily understand the language commonly used to describe the patches software companies make to their products understand the effects of the patch.  So, in this example, the language Shane used is not exclusionary.
            Another example of language people who don’t play World of Warcraft might not understand comes from episode seventy-five of Horde House.
Rob-  What’s you plan for Pandaria?  Who’s your first character that you’re taking to ninety?
Sunshine-  I don’t know.  I mean, probably my Death Knight.  I mean, she’s still, kind of, my main, but I don’t know.  Probably my Druid after that, and, I don’t know.
Rob-  You know you’re going to roll a Monk somewhere.
Sunshine-  Oh yeah.  That, honestly, that going to be, probably, my first thing I focus on actually, because I’m not really going to be in a rush to hit ninety.
(Rob, Xtopher, Grandpa, & Sunshine, The Best Little Horse House In Azeroth- Episode 75- Cataclysm, Sashay Away!, 2012)
            In this excerpt, Rob and Sunshine use several different terms to describe the various characters Sunshine plays in the game.  Similar descriptive language is used by Rob and Shane in this excerpt from episode seventy-four of Horde House, responding to a question from a listener named Phantamous.
Rob- Monk or Priest?  Shane, I haven’t played around with Monk.  What would you say are kind of the differences that Phantamous needs to consider?  I mean, at the end of the day, I don’t know, what fits your play style, right?
Shane- Well, the first thing is what spec are you going?  Because if he’s doing, choosing between those two, I assume, the only thing they really share is healing, since their DPS is ranged or melee when one tanks.  So, if he’s going Priest, you might be able to speak to that a little bit more, but for Monk healing, it’s all about, like, how your spells work with one another.  And it looks like you better be prepared so melee some too.
Rob-  As far as Priests go, if you like to play with the bubbles and the shields, the Disc Priests get to do a lot of that.  It’s really about anticipating damage, whereas Holy is a little bit more about reacting to damage.  I think Holy is a little bit underrated, because a lot of people are like “Holy Priests are so plain”, but there is a lot of flexibility within Holy Priest because of the chakras.  There are different, because you could be a tank healer or a raid healer all in one.  I gotta hand it to Holy because it’s got that ability.  Disc you can kind of do that to an extent too.  They’re both very flexible kinds of healers.  I would imagine Monk is going to have one particular kind of style to it, whereas with a Priest if you really want to heal you can have that flexibility.  And, of course, there’s Shadow Priest.
Xtopher-  And, if you wanna be the best, be a Druid.
(Rob, Xtopher, Shane, & Grandpa, The Best Little Horse House In Azeroth- Episode 74- Quit being so fat, you guys!, 2012)
            There is also this excerpt where Sunshine goes in depth about one of his characters.
Sunshine-  I’ve been leveling my Warlock, who I hadn’t really touched since the beginning of Cataclysm, because Warlocks were really, kind of like, really overbloated in Cataclysm with the rotations, and stuff.  You know, one of the things they were touting with the new talent overhaul and class overhauls is that each Warlock spec is going to have its own resource system now.  They’ve cleaned up the rotations.  So, my Warlock, she’s mainly affliction, but I also decided to give her a destruction spec, because destruction always felt, kind of, like just a firery version of a regular Warlock.  It’s so different now.  It’s really weird.  You have a passive skill that increases you mana regen by, like, I think 625%.  Basically you’re just like spamming you nuke, pretty much, and hitting some things whenever they’re charged up, and your building up burning embers.  So, it’s kind of really interesting and unique caster spec.  But, I still prefer affliction.
(Rob, Xtopher, Grandpa, & Sunshine, The Best Little Horse House In Azeroth- Episode 75- Cataclysm, Sashay Away!, 2012)
            Setting aside the question about what “spamming you nuke” means, a person who doesn’t play World of Warcraft may be puzzled about some of the terms used to describe the characters being played.  What do words like Death Knight, Druid, Monk, Priest, and Warlock mean, and how do they relate to the characters being discussed?
            A way to answer this question is to think about a busy office workplace.  Usually in an office setting everybody doesn’t do the same job.  Different people work on different things, based on that person’s skills and expertise.  In an office that works in a coherent fashion, different people with different skills work on different parts of a task to accomplish a common goal.  Such is the case with World of Warcraft.
            Death Knight, Druid, Monk, Priest, and Warlock are examples of different job classes in World of Warcraft.  When a player creates a new character in WoW, there are nine different job classes to choose from, with a tenth class that can be unlocked later in the game.  Each of these job classes come with different attributes and abilities that the character can utilize.  These different attributes and abilities help the player, as well as people in that player’s group, achieve the goals they wish to accomplish.
            World of Warcraft is not alone it its use of job classes.  There are many video games that utilize a job class system.  Final Fantasy X-2, a role playing game like World of Warcraft, features seventeen different job classes, ranging from Alchemist to White Mage to Mascot.  Guild Wars 2, an online role playing game that competes against World of Warcraft, features eight different job classes broken down into three different character professions.  Even Battlefield 3, a first person shooter played primarily online, features four different classes to choose from, representing the different roles that a soldier can take on the field of battle.
            The use of job classes in other video games shows a commonality in the use of this language.  Different games use job classes differently, and different names are used for what may be the same kind of job class, but the concept is the same.  However, a problem arises in the following example:
Rob-  You know, I think Allen is going through something similar.  Now, he’s not here to defend himself, but since he lives with me, I’ll feel the need to speak on his behalf.  He’s been having a hard time adjusting to the talents too.  He’s not been playing WoW as much, and I think that a lot of it too, and he’s a Boomkin, and I think a lot of it is, like, “What do you mean there’s no Insect Swarm?”
(Rob, Xtopher, Grandpa, & Sunshine, The Best Little Horse House In Azeroth- Episode 75- Cataclysm, Sashay Away!, 2012)
            In this case, the use of the word “Boomkin” may be particularly perplexing for people who do not play World of Warcraft.  Even people who play other role playing games may be confused as to what this word means.  Describing something as a “Death Knight” causes people to make an association with a Black Knight, common in medieval lore.  Describing something as a “White Mage” causes people to make an association with someone who uses magic for a positive end.  What association is made with a “Boomkin”?  What is a Boomkin?
            A search for an explaination of the word “Boomkin” brings up the following answer:
Players have given the moonkin form many nicknames. These are normally short and end with -kin; some of them are: Boomkin, a moonkin druid with a high damage output; Oomkin, a moonkin with poor mana regen; Doomkin, a good PVP moonkin (rarely used); Noob/newbkin, a bad/inexperienced moonkin druid; and Panzerkin, a tanking moonkin. Sometimes these nicknames are used to describe a particular druid, but most of the time players use them as a general term. Many moonkin druids find some of these nicknames insulting.
(Wikia, Inc., 2012)
            The use of the word Boomkin to describe this character may have the effect of alienating people who do not play the game.  There is no ready association between the character and the word used to describe that character.  Other problems of this nature come when looking at language used to describe how the game is played.
            This excerpt is from episode seventy-four of Horde House:
Shane- And then, LFR is stupid.  And it just teases you with stuff.
(Rob, Xtopher, Shane, & Grandpa, The Best Little Horse House In Azeroth- Episode 74- Quit being so fat, you guys!, 2012)
            This is an excerpt from episode seventy-five of Horde House:
Sunshine- I thought LFR was great.  I mean, even though the other people in it aren’t always great, just, you know, the steps that they took to make the game more accessable, which has really been something has started really back in mid-Rath, when they introduced the dungeon finder, and stuff.
(Rob, Xtopher, Grandpa, & Sunshine, The Best Little Horse House In Azeroth- Episode 75- Cataclysm, Sashay Away!, 2012)

            In both of these excerpts, something called “LFR” is mentioned.  Shane expresses a dislike for LFR, while Sunshine says he likes LFR, but neither of them says what LFR is.  In fact, nowhere during the four episodes of Horse House used as material for this essay is LFR explained.
            There are places online where LFR is explained.  According to Wowpedia, “The Raid Finder (or “Looking For Raid”, commonly abbreviated as “LFR”), similar to the Dungeon Finder, is a tool that helps players find and join a random or specific raid instance with others.”  The problem with this is that if you were unfamiliar with World of Warcraft and wanted to know what LFR was, you could not rely on the players of World of Warcraft to explain it.  An outsider would have had to use an online source because those on the inside spoke in a way that only those on the inside understand.
            Another example of this behavior occurs during episode seventy-four of Horde House.
Grandpa-  Have you ever tanked, Rob?
Rob-  Not- No- Ah, actually I take it back.  I do have an endgame character, my Warrior is eighty-five, and I use that player.  I can’t stand it.  I can’t stand it.
Shane-  I plan on becoming a Druid tank again in the next pack.
Rob-  I, on Drenden, where the official Horde House guild is- Best Little Horde House on Drenden Hordeside- on Drenden server, I have a level twenty-five Paladin that I was tanking with.  Jamie and I were leveling characters over there.  That was a lot of fun.  I love the Captain America tanking.  That’s fun.
Xtopher-  And with the change to Holy power, it actually, I hear, makes tanking a lot of fun on Paladins.
Rob-  What about you Grandpa?  You have a tank?
Grandpa-  I have everything.
(Rob, Xtopher, Shane, & Grandpa, The Best Little Horse House In Azeroth- Episode 74- Quit being so fat, you guys!, 2012)

            In this excerpt Rob and Shane discuss their experience tanking.  Shane talks about how he wants to be a druid tank, while Rob talks about how he used his level twenty-five Paladin as a tank.  Neither host gives an explanation as to what tanking is.  This is despite tanking being an activity that one must prepare themselves to do, as is shown in this excerpt from episode seventy-five:
Xtopher-  Also, I have this interest in tanking this time.  But, ah, I didn’t realize that with the talent reset they actually kept you two specs that you had before, you know.  So, I didn’t really venture into respecing yet.  Plus, I don’t have any gear for the other specs.
(Rob, Xtopher, Grandpa, & Sunshine, The Best Little Horse House In Azeroth- Episode 75- Cataclysm, Sashay Away!, 2012)

Tanking also appears to be an enjoyable way to play the game, as is shown in this excerpt from later on in episode seventy-five:
Rob-  Let’s get into some Warcraft Tweets at Twitter.com/HordeHouse.  FlacoJones starting us off tonight.  “My favorite part of the scenario was tanking as an Elemental Shaman.  Reminded me of early WoW, we did more unorthodox stuff.”
(Rob, Xtopher, Grandpa, & Sunshine, The Best Little Horse House In Azeroth- Episode 75- Cataclysm, Sashay Away!, 2012)
There are several conclusion that can be drawn from these examples of how players of World of Warcraft speak.  The general tone of The Best Little Horde House In Azeroth seems to be friendly, comical, and generally non-confrontational.  All of the hosts seem to be friends who know each other and how each of them plays the game.  The familiarity had between the hosts of the show allows them to feel free to talk about things that go on in the game.  This friendly atmosphere may explain why the hosts discussed things in the way that they did without feeling the need to explain what they were talking about.  Even people who have knowledge and experience in playing other video games, and even other role playing video games, may have a problem following the discussion had in this podcast.  Not all of the examples presented here are purposefully exclusionary.  Some of the exclusionary tactics are a result of the way that companies communicate with the public, or how the normal public may be unaware of the mechanics that video games are commonly built on.  However, these exclusionary tactics are there, and are a part of the reason that people who do not actively play World of Warcraft are intimidated from doing so.


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