Costume?

Today is Halloween, a day on which many adults wear scary costumes to work that fall in line with their workplace's dress code guidelines.  Like many adults, I to have a job where I can wear a costume on this festive day.  So, what costume am I wearing to work today?

Dude, the Red Sox won the World Series last night.  I'm wearing my David Ortiz jersey to work today.

Happy Boston Red Sox Winning The World Series

A Concrete Solution

Late on Tuesday a story started circulating that has touched many people.  It is the story of a man who died alone and unable to contact anyone after an accident in the Utah desert.  Sadly this story is all to common.  There are many people who have died similar deaths in the Utah desert.  Many of the people could have gotten the help they so desperately needed if they weren't stuck in the bottom of a narrow piece of rock.

We have waited far too long to deal with situations like this.  Too many people have died due to something that can be easily fixed.  The time has come.  We have the technology, the materials, and the manpower to put an end to people dying cold and alone in the narrow rock formations that fill many parts of Utah.  Today, in memory of all that have died in the Utah desert, I am proposing that we fill all of the narrow rock formations in Utah with concrete.

This proposal hold the potential to be an economic boon to depressed areas in Eastern and Southern Utah.  This proposal will provide good, honest work to people who need it.  Public works projects have worked before in kickstarting the American economy, and it can work today.  By filling the narrow rock formations in Utah with concrete, we can not only save lives, we can help people start their lives anew.

There are those who would argue that such rock formations are treasures of nature that should not be changed by the hands of man.  The people who argue such things are liberals who stand in the way of progress and the will of God.  As it is said in Genesis 1:28, "...fill the earth and subdue it...".  We also have inspiration from modern day to go forth with such a project.  As Ronald Reagan once said, "Oh yes, please, fill it up.  Fill it right to the brim.  Thank you."

There are those who would say that the narrow rock formations in Utah should be preserved for future generations.  I say that if we do not fill the narrow rock formations in Utah with concrete those future generations may not materialize.  For the sake of the lives, memories, and futures of the people of this Earth, this work must be done and it must be done now.  Thank you and God bless.

I am Hunter Red and I approve this message.

Questioning The Legality Of Police Using GPS Tracker Cannons

Police firing GPS tracking 'bullets' at cars during chases

At first glance this seems like a really cool story: Cops using GPS trackers to track a car they are pursuing instead of engaging in a high speed pursuit.  This technology could save lives, prevent property loss, and even prevent that bastard who stole my high end sports car from wrecking it in a place that I would never, and will never, go to.  But, once again, the skeptic in me rears his ugly head.  Sure the police can fire GPS trackers at a fleeing vehicle, but is it legal for them to do so?

In Unites States v. Jones, the Supreme Court dealt with whether police can put a GPS tracker on a suspect's car, deciding that the placement of such a device constituted a search of private property, and that keeping the GPS tracker on the car for an extended amount of time constituted a unreasonable search of a person's private property.  While that decision deals with a person that is suspected a crime, how does this decision affect whether the police can shoot a GPS tracker on the car of a person they know has committed a crime?  Does public safety affect the legality of such a decision?  What about length of time?  If the GPS tracker is placed and the car is not found for a couple of days, does the length of time it took to find the car affect whether or not the police can use this technology in this manner?

When contacted by this reporter for this story, Supreme Court Justice Antonin Scalia said, "What the fuck are you doing on my property?  Get the fuck out of here, you fucking liberal."

When queried, the public relations department for the West Valley City Police Department said, in a statement, "Why can't you journalistic types just leave us alone?!?  We were just fine before you people started poking around in our business, and now- and now- Look at us!  We're a police force in shambles.  Just get out.  Get out!"

I have yet to receive a clear answer about the legality of GPS trackers being shot from police vehicles at suspect vehicles.  One thing is clear though, I know who I don't trust with this technology.

This Is Why I Don't Ride The Train

Play video of "Punishment ☆ Punch Girl!"

I have a distinct feeling that this video game is a threat, but I can't figure out why.

Punishment punch Girl!

Also, why would someone wear a pink unitard with a yellow ribbon?  Pink goes with pink, yellow goes with yellow, and red boxing gloves go with pain!

Have You Punched A Pervert Today?

Gassed

I went to last nights TNA Impact tapings held at the Maverick Center in West Valley City.  As a result of the great show that was put on and the good time I had at the great show, I am somewhat gassed this morning.  So, I'm going to post this.  This video articulates many of the concerns that I have about the NSA and the recent revelations about their data collection.

Voyeuristic?

The hidden room inside Mitt Romney’s new Utah house

The link above leads to a story that was reported in the Salt Lake Tribune on Wednesday.  The story describes a so called "secret room" in the new house Mitt Romney is building in Holladay, Utah.  There are many other details about the new Romney home, including particulars about how the home is laid out and how large is the home is.

All of this leaves me with the following impression: Why do I need to know this?  Yes, the Romneys are building a new home in Holladay.  While that may or may nor be significant, why would I need to know specific details about it?  What business is it of mine to know this information?  More importantly, is this just an invasion of the Romney family's personal privacy, or, if I dig around deep enough, can I find information like this about every home in the Salt Lake Valley?

It's A New iPad Air, Cheryl

On Tuesday, a slew of new Apple products were unveiled, including the iPad Air.  The new device will be 20 per cent thinner, feature a slim outer bezel that's 43 narrower than the previous iPad, a 9.7-inch Retina display, and will weight just one pound.

Shortly after the new product's unveiling, Phil Schiller, Apple's Senior Vice President of Worldwide Marketing, answered some questions about the new iPad Air.  Specifically, he answered the question of why he felt the new iPad needed to be smaller and lighter.

"There are many reasons why our new products are smaller and lighter.  We want products that appeal to our customer's needs, both their consumer needs and their aesthetic needs.  After many rounds of customer surveys, as well as a poll of people in positions of influence inside our company, it became very clear that our consumers prefer things that are smaller and lighter.  In fact, we've found that people have a preference for smaller and lighter in many different aspects of their lives.  This ranges from their consumer products, food choices, and even their romantic lives.  I know, from personal experience, what my preferences were when I was "in the market", and although my current wife doesn't currently achieve what my preferences are, I know that will change in the future.  Yes, I aspire to have smaller and lighter things in all aspects of my life, Cheryl.  Now, is that thing on?"

Shortly after this interview was conducted, I was delicately asked to leave Apple's October Conference by five very large men in matching black turtlenecks.

I Have A List

As Federal Shutdown Ends, Utah Lawmakers Bogged Down Over $0.00029 Tax Increase

In the article linked above, the people who claim to represent the people of Utah are mulling over a increase in the already high amount of taxes that people pay on alcohol.  One of the reasons why taxes on alcohol are so high is to dissuade consumption of alcohol.  What the people who claim to represent the people of Utah don't realize is that there is a growing number of people in Utah who are using alcohol as a way to rage against the man.  They are drinking alcohol, not because they enjoy the taste or the aftereffects of drinking alcoholic beverages, but rather to stick up a middle finger to the people who seek to control their behavior.  One of those people is me.

The picture above is an example of me raging out against the man.  I even wrote a blog post about it.  In fact, I'm drunk while writing this blog post, and I am only drunk to spite John Valentine.  In the next couple of weeks, I plan to go forth with a plan to rage out against the man again in very specific ways.  How to I plan to do this?

Utah brewers bring home 5 medals from Denver Beer Fest

Hoppers Grill and Brewing Co.

Wasatch Brew Pub and Brewery

Squatters Pubs and Beers

Red Rock Brewery

Uinta Brewing

I have a list.

Break Something Expensive Tonight

Occasionally, in the course of my human events, it becomes necessary, at least necessary to me, to break some things.  Rather than breaking random things in my environment, or things that might have great emotional value to me, I choose to break things of substantive economic value.  In short, I like to break expensive things, for breaking expensive things for the sole purpose of breaking them is something that most people feel is wrong, and sometimes I like to feel wrong.

I think I have a new project to pursue.

Reports Of Shutdown Activities Now Coming Out

On Saturday, while the government shutdown was still going on, Utah Governor Gary Herbert moved to open the many national parks in Utah, authorizing $1.67 Million in state dollars to be spent toward that end.  Tourists and locals alike flocked to Utah's national parks to experience all that the parks have to offer.  Now reports are coming out about what many of the people who congregated to the parks did in the days when they thought no authority existed.

News reports stated that "throngs" were drawn to Utah's national parks.  It now appears that "thongs" may be the more accurate way to describe the people that were being drawn.  Multiple reports state that many of the overnight campers at Bryce, Arches, and Canyonlands National Parks were witnessed having sex in public.  Similar accounts exists concerning activities at Zion's and Capital Reef but nothing formal has been reported.

Gordon Ranger, known in the area as Ranger Gord, pictured above, has filed several of the reports.  One of his reports goes as follows.

"I've never seen that much naked flesh.  You think that the kind of people who would engage in such behavior would be more svelte that that.  But no.  No."

It's not that Park Rangers weren't out in force in Utah during the government shutdown.  There were many arrests made in Utah's national parks, but most of those arrests have to do with public intoxication, as well as other drug related offenses.  It appears that people thought that, due to the government shutdown, that all of the government was shutdown, including police.  While that wasn't the case, people thought it was so, and, like they say, when the cats at play the mice will play.  Naked.  In public.  Ew.

Red Review- Grand Theft Auto V

It's rare that stress gets to me. My job is one without stress, I don't have a romantic life and therefore no real romantic stress, and my financial situation is quite stable. The only thing that really bothers me is my family. Sometimes I just feel my family just asks too much from me. Sometimes it seems like anytime I have some time off, or some extra money, they try to take it away from me. That is what is stressful to me, and sometimes I need to just get away from it.




I legitimately wish I could take a vacation from my family. Not my work, my family. Unfortunately I can't really choose to do one or the other. I need to get away from both because once I get away from work my family starts hitting me up to do shit for them. It's not like I can go to a hotel and still go to work while avoiding the main source of stress in my life. As a result, rarely go on vacation. What I actually do to relieve the stress from my family is drive. Driving allows me to get away from the stresses of life, if only for a little while.




Every so often I will hit the roads for a good long drive. Sometimes I pick somewhere, a restaurant or a store I've never been to, and just go there. Sometimes I just pick a direction and go. Given where I live, I can't really go West, but North, South, and East all hold have great places to see and great places to drive near.




The Grand Theft Auto series has also allowed me to just drive around in the game environment with no real structure or point. There is a simple joy to finding a nice, clear, smooth stretch of road and just driving on it. Driving on it for as long and as far as it will take you.




There is also a simple joy to hitting motorcyclist with your car. Fuck motorcyclists.




Grand Theft Auto V: A

ELECTION NOTICE TO ALL QUALIFIED VOTERS OF PRICE CITY, UTAH

ELECTION NOTICE
TO ALL QUALIFIED VOTERS OF 
PRICE CITY, UTAH:

Take notice that on November 5, 2013, a municipal general election (the "Election") will be held in Price City, Utah (heretofore referred to as the "City"), at the polling places listed below.  In conjunction therewith, a ballot proposition will be submitted to the qualified voters of the City as follows:

PROPOSITION NO. 7
 
PRICE CITY, UTAH
ZAPP TAX ELECTION 
NOVEMBER 5, 2013

/s/  Leslie Barbara Knope
Carbon County Parks Department and Clerk

Shall Price City, Utah, be reauthorized to impose a one-tenth of one percent (0.1%) sales and use tax for the purpose of funding a monument to Zapp Brannigan in Price City?

FOR REAUTHORIZING THE IMPOSITION OF A ONE-TENTH OF ONE PERCENT (0.1%) ZAPP TAX


AGAINST REAUTHORIZING THE IMPOSITION OF A ONE-TENTH OF ONE PERCENT (0.1%) ZAPP TAX

To vote in favor of this tax, completely darken the oval in front of the words "FOR REAUTHORIZING THE IMPOSITION OF A ONE-TENTH OF ONE PERCENT (0.1%) ZAPP TAX".  To vote against this tax, completely darken the oval in front of the words, "AGAINST REAUTHORIZING THE IMPOSITION OF A ONE-TENTH OF ONE PERCENT (0.1%) ZAPP TAX".

For purposes of this Election, the polling places for the Election shall be as follows:

Voting Districts- Precincts #4, #10, #12, #15, #19, #20, #21, #28, #29, #31, #34, #44, #45, #47, #50, #53, #59, #65, #70, #72, #89, #90, #99, #105, #106, #108, #112, #116, #118, #119, #122, #127, #130, #BBS2007, #TBWABB2008, #ITWGY2009, are consolidated to: D.O.O.P. Headquaters, 760 DOOP Plaza, North Price, Utah

The polls will be open from 7:00 a.m. to 8:00 p.m.

There will be no special registration of voters for the Election; all persons registered to vote in the general election of the City shall be considered registered to vote in this Election and the official register last made or revised shall constitute the register for this Election.  The Carbon County Parks and Recreation and Clerk will make available at the polling places, a registration list or copy thereof listing all registered voters entitled to use such polling place.

Voting will be allowed to take place at the times, places, and manner as provided by the Utah Election Code, Title 20A, Utah Code Annotated 1953, as amended. For information about alternate times and forms of voting (including by absentee ballot), voters may contact the office of the Chris Traeger, Carbon County Auditor, at 120 E. Main, Price, Utah 84501. 

NOTICE is given that on October 21, 2013, at 12:00 noon, in the Carbon County Parks Department and Clerk's office, the County Deputy Director of the Parks Department and Clerk  conducted a test of the voting and/or counting devices, as applicable, to be used for the general election. Any interested person may witness the testing procedure.

NOTICE is further given that on November 13, 2013, that being no sooner than seven (7) days nor later than fourteen (14) days after the Election, the City Council will meet at its regular meeting place at 5:30 p.m. to canvass the returns and declare the results of the Election. 

/s/ Leslie Barbara Knope

Carbon County Parks Department and Clerk
Published in R.C.O.A.: The Four Stars Blog on October 16, 2013 CE

Marriage Equality Will Come Soon?

Marriage equality will arrive in Utah soon

On Saturday, a editorial was printed in the Salt Lake Tribune, penned by Paul C. Burke, John W. Mackay, and Brett L. Tolman.  This editorial gives the opinion that equal marriage rights for all people, whether they are in a homosexual relationship or in heterosexual relationship, will happen in the state of Utah soon by way of the judicial system.  The three attorneys cite quotes from Supreme Court Justice Antonin Scalia, passages from Utah's Constitutional Amendment 3, as well as the acumen of the justices that currently sit on the Utah Supreme Court as a part of their argument.

While marriage equality is something that I personally support, I must put on my skeptic hat for a moment.  While I personally support marriage equality, I do not think that it will happen in the state of Utah soon.  I'd like it to but I don't think it'll happen.  This is why I feel this way.

Prop. 8 protest draws thousands in Salt Lake City

On the night that California's Prop 8 passed, a large group of people gathered to protest the LDS Church's involvement in the passage of that proposition.  I remember seeing these protests on the news as I followed the nationwide election coverage.  I watched these protests and one thought came to my mind: Where were these people when Amendment 3 was passed?  Where was the outrage then?  Were was the mobilization then?  Why couldn't these people have been as organized back then at they are now?

Sure the gay community in Utah has grown, not just in size but also as a collective force in politics.  The problem is that the gay community in Utah still does not have anything close to the influence that the conservative establishment has.  Liberals in Utah have not even made much of a dent in the state of Utah in recent years.  The reason that I am not currently a member of the Utah Democratic Party is that I don't see it as having any influence in the state.  That lack of influence is what gives me my sense of skepticism.

It is my honest belief that when marriage equality comes to the state of Utah it will come after the conservative argument for marriage equality takes hold.  The argument against government control over who we associate with and how we conduct our private affairs is the argument that will have a chance of swaying the overwhelmingly conservative people of Utah.  Unfortunately that argument has yet to really take hold in America, much less in the state of Utah.  If the judiciary does overturn Utah's Amendment 3, I have no doubt that, under the current circumstances, that a new law denying homosexuals marriage rights will be passed within months, if not weeks.  I don't want to see this happen but I cannot deny the skeptic in me that tells me it is so.

Artificially Intelligent Sexualized Tentacle Robots

For decades people have feared the possibility of artificial intelligence.  One of the forms of that fear crystallized with the 1984 release of The Terminator. The concept of an military artificial intelligence turning on the human race, and using the tools of the military to do so, is something that has driven many paranoid fantasies.

Another part of the paranoia that people have has to do with the sexualization of robots.  It has long been thought that cyborgs that are modeled after women could potentially insert themselves into the highest levels of government, develop a relationship with someone with information that a foreign entity wants, and then steal that information without having to deal with any of the baggage that comes with dealing with an actual living person.  This may be part of the reason why cyborg technology has not progressed past the point of the dancing robot.  The American audience's general aversion to the sexualization of robots also helps explain why the portrayal robots more closely resemble machine than man.

Many of the developments in robot technology have come from Japan, where they also have a particular kind of fetish porn knows as "Tentacle Erotica".  This particular form of erotica surged in popularity in response to Japan's censorship of pornography.  American audiences have an even more negative reaction to tentacle erotica than they do the sexualization of robots.  You'd have to be mad to combine the two, right?  You'd have to be absolutely insane if you were to combine advanced artificial intelligence, sexualized robots, and tentacle erotica, right?  Right?

Moving In Slow Motion: End

I own a 2008 Mercury Mountaineer, pictured above.  It has three rows of seats, the third row is on the very back and requires you to flip up two seats in the very back part of the car.  These seats can be hard to get into and are somewhat cramped.  When I got my car I said that my car, "Seats six, four comfortably."  This was a joke.  I no longer make this joke.  Why?  When my family heard that joke, they didn't hear the "four comfortably" part of it.  All they heard was "Seats six", which they interpret as "Seats six!  That means he can take me places!"

So I've decided to end the Moving In Slow Motion blog series.  This is not because I have accomplished Project Buy A House.  In fact I can feel that goal getting further and further away with every passing day.  The reason that I am ending this blog series is that my family reads my blog.  Due to the in the Moving In Slow Motion including exact dollar amounts, my family, rather than seeing me getting closer to a big goal in my life, sees those dollar amounts and knows that I have money that I can give to them.  Sure I could say no, but my family knows that all they have to do is cry poverty and I have no choice but to fold.

It's not that I want to end this blog series.  Knowing that I was getting closer to my goals, and torturing myself in a purely masochist way, was quite enjoyable to me.  It's just that keeping this blog series going is preventing my from accomplishing my goals.  After all, if people do not know the opportunity is there they are less likely to act.  Also my family operates on the assumption that they are entitled to my money.  I'm just hoping that if I don't broadcast how much money I have, they will ask me for less of it.  In that way, I can once again continue in my pursuit of Project Buy A House.

I Saw The Sign And It Opened Up My Eyes

Over the past couple of weeks, billboards like the one shown above have started popping up in New York, Los Angeles, and San Francisco.  These billboards were put up BitTorrent, Inc., who's blog can be found here.

While this are a great subversive way to spread BitTorrent's message, these billboards leave me with the following question:

WHY ARE THEY NOT HERE WHERE I LIVE AND SPREADING THE MESSAGE TO PEOPLE AROUND ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Yes, the message is getting around to internet connected people via, of all things, the internet, but the people who see BitTorrent as a threat generally are not that tech savvy.  These are people who believe iPods spread Antisemitism, that Xbox 360s help spread the word of Al Qaeda, and that Roombas are akin to, in their words, "that giant metal robot that what killed all of humanities".

Tech savvy people need to start realizing that messages such as the ones put out by BitTorrent, Inc. should not just be seen in the major population centers of this country.  This is a message that needs to be spread countrywide, perhaps by smaller bands who act independently to spread the message to people who might not otherwise not receive it.  The downside of that strategy is that authorities might perceive such a group to be a decentralized terrorist organization, much like how they perceive ALF.

No, not that one!  This ALF.

Project Buy A House That's Not On The Freeway

As I mentioned yesterday, over the past year I've been working on Project Buy A House.  This has involved me reducing my monthly expenses, spending less money on entertainment, and other things that have made this process something that had better pay off in something really good.  Really good.

Of the things that I am concerned with as I pursue Project Buy A House, one that is the most concern to me is location.  Ideally I'd like to buy a house near where I work, but since I work in a largely industrial area this may not be an ideal place to live given the amount of crime that is typically in locations like this.  I'd like to own a home in a nice residential neighborhood, but given that I will be buying this house by myself I may not be able to afford a house in a nice neighborhood.

Given that my work is adjacent to the freeway, I'd like to own a house near the freeway.  I'd like to own a house in a place where I can easily get on the freeway without having to deal with a lot of the traffic concerns that plague locations of this kind.  I'd like a place that is near the freeway.  Near the freeway.

Not ON the freeway, just near it.

Hopefully my pursuit of Project Buy A House will go better as we all move closer to the new year.  Hopefully.  Hopefully.

I'd Love To Review Beyond: Two Souls, However...

Beyond: Two Souls came out on Tuesday, and the game from the developer of Heavy Rain and Indigo Prophecy has garnered mixed reviews, ranging from Five Stars from Digital Spy to a 4/10 from Metro GameCentral.  I'd love to review Beyond: Two Souls, however there are three things preventing me from doing so.

There's the Boston Red Sox/Tampa Bay Rays ALDS series that I am watching as I am writing this blog post.  Each of the games have eaten up about four hours of my night/morning, which has resulted in my DVR being abnormally full.

Then there's Grand Theft Auto V, which I am still trying to complete.  I managed to get into Grand Theft Auto Online yesterday, and found that if I truly want to experience this part of the game I need to invest a lot more time into it.

Then there's the primary reason why I haven't even bought Beyond: Two Souls as of yet: Project Buy A House.  My pursuit of this goal has been pushed back recently after my rent was increased, of which I was informed of two days before my rent was actually due. Further pushing back my pursuit of this goal is my family continuing to act as if I have a great amount of excess cash that I can bestow on them at will.  It's as if they don't realize that my money is mine and that I have plans to do things with my money that is mine.

Perhaps in the future I will be able to play and review Beyond: Two Souls.  Perhaps in the future I will accomplish Project Buy A House.  And, perhaps in the future, vivid rainbows will fly out of my ass.  Untill then, I can only dream and hope.................................................................................................................. that my family stops hitting me up for cash like I'm a fucking ATM machine.